Thought I would just write about what I'm thankful for this Thansgiving. Now that the dust has more or less settled from the divorce and the changes it has wrought in my life, I'm surprised by how MUCH I have to be thankful for!
I'm thankful for my lovely new home. Although I stress sometimes about getting it paid off before I hit retirement, (that fear of being an impoverished old single woman!) I know in reality I can probably manage the mortgage no matter what life throws my way. I am grateful that I have enough rooms to take in family (at present, my eldest son and my mom) or needy friends,or possibly future boarders, while still having enough private space for my own comfort.
I'm thankful for a steady income. Being self-employed and starting right at the beginning of the financial meltdown, I feel blessed to have been able to keep my head above water financially. And I'm starting to have enough energy to think ahead about ways to possibly improve that income in the future.
I'm thankful for a fair divorce settlement. Certainly not lopsided, just even. I see some women here who end up with pitifully little, and I'm thankful that we were able to negotiate a fair deal for both of us.
I'm thankful for the lovely men I've dated since my divorce. Through sheer luck, they've been men who validated me, made me feel sexy and alive, and they all have a warm spot in my heart (yes, even Big Lots, who, although he turned out to be terminally broken, was delightfully appreciative of what my ex used to consider my figure "flaws". God bless him for that ).
I'm thankful for my band mates, who've been with me practicing every week, week in and week out, for the last two years. They push me but never complain if I'm struggling with a song, listen to my stories and call me on my whining like obnoxious but well-intentioned little brothers, and they drag me out to see bands on weeknights that I'd probably never otherwise get to see.
I'm thankful for my kids, who despite their current struggles, are all bright, loving, good kids, and who are coming to value things in me that they couldn't see that well when they were teens.
I'm thankful that my mom is healthy and active at 80, and that my sister and I have been able to travel with her in the last couple of years.
I'm thankful for my best friend, who has listened to all my fears and woes while I have listened to hers. When you don't have a man in your life to lean on, you realize how valuable a friend's ear can be.
And I'm thankful for all of you, for the invaluable lessons I've learned and am still learning here.
Wonderful! Life after divorce does go on and hopefully in such a rewarding manner. I am now happily married and living in Alaska. My daughter and son-in-law work for *the mouse* in SoCal and my son has just started working as a paramedic and firefighter here in Alaska. I am so thankful for the support and friendships found here on the board, some which migrated to real life and even eventually marriage.
Happy Thanksgiving to you and yours, Ellie!
SG! How's it going? Happy Thanksgiving! Barb, I hope all is well with you and your family.
Love and Happy Thanksgiving to all! ~ swl
Look not mournfully into the past. It comes not back again. Wisely improve the present. It is thine. Go forth to meet the shadowy future, without fear. {Henry Wadsworth Longfellow}
How fun! Lurker Girl, Barb and Ellie...all Survivors I've met IRL! I am doing fantastic. Great job at a school I love (small, project based learning, technology infused curriculum) together with a wonderful man, fixing up my little house. Like Ellie, it'll be paid off by the time I retire. Life is good!
Survival Goddess "The most common way people give up their power is by thinking they don't have any." -Alice Walker
See Rick - it just takes time. I've met the California girls and that was years ago. So glad to hear everyone is doing great. I actually came to the boards 11 years ago - my date under my name is WRONG. Nov 2, 2001 was my date.
It was so nice to read of your gratefulness. Your message to count the small things is a very important message. Too many in this day and age are out to get as much as they can, driven by a sense of entitlement. You're an inspiration because you earned and rightfully deserved everything you are grateful for.
Suit
"It's better to have no spouse than have a bad spouse"
).