Whew! That was a long stay away. Sorry to have worried you lot but it's been for the best.
Why?
Because I've actually been practicing my DB skills. I've been GAL. I've been visiting. I've had guests to the house. I've been cooking. I've been cleaning. I've been on a break. I've been back to work (ug). I've found a Church!!!!! I've made decisions. I've had "insider info" given to me - not asked for mind you - given freely. I've been given hope.
Cor! What a load of I've's. But thats what this journey has been all about. Finding myself. And I have. I can actually see a road in front of me and, you know what, it's got a W on it!
Yes I know what you have been saying to me. And yes I understood why you said it. And it was painful. But the bandaid has been applied, I have a full team of doctors and nurses looking after me. And I feel FABULOUS!
Oh, Zig honey (and Serenity as always) I really should have found the time to pop in and tell you I'm fine. But at the time I really wasn't. But now? All change! Zig I hope you find what I've been up to "on the other inter web location" surprising, refreshing and above all enlightening.
Let me fill you in on whats been happening. Only the names have been changed to protect the innocent And to keep it short, this is through the last week.
I've been GAL in the local Pitza/Local and catching up with old friends. One (Al) became a true friend who, to my surprise, has some very deep currents to his personality. Some things that people just would not believe. He's the guy that drink's, smokes and……... got me to Church on sunday. A very special day. A day of a baptism of one of the Pastors girls. Fabulous! A day of peace. A day of actually KNOWING that someone's there. A guide above. And the chap that has to be running things in the background. How else could some of the things I've been told actually be happening?
Yes I know some of the cynics will be pointing at what I've done for myself. And that has to be partly true. But it's what I've been doing, where I've been doing it and who I've been doing it with (and when!) that's truly miraculous.
I digress. Let me tell you about the weekend. Mine and the W's (not together - don't get your hopes up!).
I've been busy - cooking up a storm, entertaining new friends and getting on with things. Cher was one of them. She has had her life "destroyed" by the "friend". She mentioned that another mutual friend - Beryl - has heard some very positive things from my W. Beryl really needs to get her bum to my house
Wendi sent me a private message via "another portal" saying she can see the end in sight - not the D end! The W was with her at her sons house over the weekend and she went for a walk along the beech with Wendi's son. My W said outright to him that she's not at all sure that what she's doing is the right thing. He asked her was that her head or her heart taking. The answer? Her heart. I paid Wendi a visit last night and she gave me the biggest of hugs and had a huge smile on her face!
Question for the ladies - is the heart stronger than the head?
My W has been getting some "stick" from people over the past three months. The exact opposite of what's been coming my way. An example and a BIG one. My MIL (W's mother), posted on "the other site" for all to see a message out of the blue!!!! ………..
"Hi Mac, wish I was there. Love youuuu xxxx" followed by a long chat
W was more than a bit "ticked off" because she said I knew more about what was going on than she did!
We (W and I) had a chat yesterday about the direction she was going in and she was saying the exact opposite of what she's been saying to everyone else!!!! Methinks a test to see how the water was. We ended on a chat about money (via the L's letter the previous week). She was surprised and a little in tears that the finances weren't as good as she thought they'd be! So instead of R2,200 she ended up with R500 and an explanation.
Oh - just had Andre (the Pastor) on the phone and we're meeting on Friday
Always good to see you and naturally I am thrilled to hear you found a Church
I will be honest though, I had hoped when you came back that there would be some form of "something" that had been done on the part of both of you.
If you guys end up back together without working on the underlying issues, there is a very good chance you will end up back here in a couple of years.
Originally Posted By: mac-ct
Question for the ladies - is the heart stronger than the head?
IMO it is the head... The heart is ruled by emotion, therefore it cannot be trusted in matters such as these, since emtions are fleeting and can change in an instant.
(((Hugs)))
May All Who Seek To Take My Life Be Put To Shame And Confusion; May All Who Desire My Ruin Be Turned Back In Disgrace. ~Psalm 40:14~
Well another fabulous day down on Cape Town. The gardener is on his way to give the grass a trim. And while I wait it gives me a moment to reflect and give thanks.
Michele has a phrase "keep doing what works". And like the fabulous lady she is, she's right.
Finding yourself is the key. The right self. The selfLESS. Practice it and it'll become a habit. One I won't give up easily. It's the fundamental building block that all things hinge on (whoa! Do blocks have hinges?).
Reach that point and two things will happen - related things.
1. You'll be in a better space. A space in which you'll be able to process all the weirdness that may, or may not, pop up.
2. Things will just"happen". Maybe things still "happen" it's just that you'll actually notice it/them by finding yourself that "space".
Serenity - I hope I'm making sense here. Strangely it does to me. I read what your answer was about the heart and the mind - a loaded question if ever there was one. And I understand your answer - the mind because the heart can change easily. Well that's what makes it a loaded question. Because whichever one the W chooses, and has chosen by what others are telling me, she's actually thinking that maybe, just maybe D isn't the way to go. It's what I choose to do with the budding situation that counts. The choice is to avoid getting into this situation again.
There's a few people on this board who are stars in offering their help and assistance who have been trapped in a revolving door on more than one occasion. Only to FINALLY twig what's causing it and fixing the cause. Whatever that may be.
I want to join that team. I want to devote myself to the family. Not money, not possessions, but just family. It will take ongoing work. I've finally found somewhere which will help and someone. Where? The church and the pastor. I have the strongest feeling that he's prepared to beat up anyone who doesn't toe the line
Changes are on the way. It'll sure take time because this didn't happen overnight.
And now? Keep doing what works.
Cheers one and all but especially zig and serenity ((((to you both))))
Zig I hope you find what I've been up to "on the other inter web location" surprising, refreshing and above all enlightening.
And to keep it short, this is through the last week.