Show season is all wrapped up, waiting for final points updates before I brag!
Thanksgiving has always been my favorite holiday. This year is the first in a long row that I don't feel like this will be the last year we spend together.
A friend stopped by tonight and said she and her H weren't getting along so great right now because she just found out why they kept getting denied for refinancing their house. She saw the credit report and the 5 credit cards maxed out. She had no clue. My H didn't say much, and neither did I, we listened. Recovering from the debt fiasco will be tough for a long time.
I hope everyone finds at least one thing to be thankful about.
Live your life while you are still living. Riding the trail less traveled.
MOO! Love you, WCW! You sound fantastic. I love your description of H inching his way back into your life at the beginning of this thread--he continues to make his way home to you slowly but surely. Happy Thanksgiving!
WCW, You asked about Laughing/Between the Tears....I have not heard from her in several months.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
Thanks snodderly. amd, so nice that you checked in, hope you keep updating!
Well, I think H is ready or almost ready for the Big F talk - Finances. Maybe it was spurred by the friend the other night, and what he heard me say to her about handling talking to her H. Today, H stopped by my work just as I was ready to leave, and said he had been to see our banker and got an application to see if he could get a consolidation loan. It would be less interest/one payment rather than trying to pay on multi credit cards. I asked how much total, and though I am shocked at the 6 figure amount it is still not as bad as I was preparing myself for.
I cannot understand why I am not furious about all of this, and I almost feel calm now that H is finally ready to address this mess. What is wrong with me?
To top off the day I got a call that involved horses/ow again, and I had to pass the message to H. He received it well and seemed to understand and address my feelings about the request. Time will tell.
Live your life while you are still living. Riding the trail less traveled.
Nothing's wrong with you. You knew about the financial disaster (in general terms) almost two years ago, if I recall, and chose to move beyond it. You were prepared.
Oh, in case you don't recognize me after my banning, I used to be dh.
Life with H is still improving. I have made room in the bedroom again for his clothes should he choose to move them back in to the house. He's been leaving things a little at a time, so I figured it was time to make room. No announcement, no shouting from the top of the mountain, just action at the pace of a snail.
H joined me for family activites this weekend. I had a brief flashback of 7 years ago when he blew up about nothing and left in the middle of the night, and I was such a wreck for this family day. But ya know what? only 1 person noticed anything at all, so maybe I was only a wreck on the inside.
The other evening H and I sat and talked about nothing and anything, the tv was off, the computers were off, just us talking. Years ago a poster here told me to do that, and it has taken me this long to take that advice and feel comfortable that it would be okay.
I am still learning and feeling out how to help and support without being controling or emasculating. Wow that's hard for me!
Live your life while you are still living. Riding the trail less traveled.
Here's my vent for the day - H hogs the covers. LOL I have arranged them evenly, more on my side, more on his side, he always ends up with the most and I am cold on the outside edge. But, I ain't saying a word about it because once when I asked why he was still sleeping on the couch he told me because I always complained that he hogged the covers and told everyone about it! So mums the word, and I'll get another blanket just to hang over my edge of the bed. LOL
It still works best for my sitch to plant the seed when the ground is ready and let H do the watering. He talked about his dry itchy back and I said "remember when we gave each back rubs with oil and ...." of course he said "NO" but later that night was good.
Live your life while you are still living. Riding the trail less traveled.
