Ex hasn't been keeping up with his child/spousal support, so now I have to take him to family court so they will just deduct it from his check each month.
I'm just so tired of this. I just want to get on with my life but he is like this annoying anchor that is always trying to pull me down with him.
I think he is withholding money because he is bothered by the fact I was able to purchase a house. You would think that he would be happy the kids have a roof over their heads, but instead he is jealous.
I'm so sorry to hear this. I had hoped he would be "man" enough to pay the support, but being the passive aggressive @ss that he is, I'm not surprised. He's not happy w/life and he actually thinks that you beat him at his own game...got a house all on your own and doing just fine. He wanted to control and manipulate every move you made. Well, it ain't happening...take him to court and have his wages garnished and the money sent directly to your account, i.e., that way you never have to ask him for one red cent and not deal w/his crap.
On another note, how did the holidays go? Where you able to unpack and get a tree up, etc.? Did everyone have a nice holiday? Are you back in school? Are you okay?
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
I'm sorry your x is such a jerk and you are probably spot on that he's annoyed you've been able to rise from the ashes like a pheonix ... well of course you have ... he's the only one who's surprised!
He has an obligation to support his children - and you have an obligation to hold him to it. I know it's probably been a tough decision to got the formal legal route, but you are absolutely right to. Don't for one minute buy into his poor-me attitude.
Hope you had a gorgeous holiday period and your not too cold.
I was just talking to my mum who is holidaying at my sister's in Washington DC and she said it's so cold there she can barely stand the thought of going anywhere (and we were only talking about her going to pick my nephew up from school - not a trip to the beach!) ... hard to imagine when it was 115 degrees in my part of the world yesterday.
let us know how you go. I think of you often.
Cheers, V
V
Never make someone a priority, who makes you an option.
Hi Snodderly, He had asked me with a jealous tone how I was able to get a mortgage when he needed his gf to get a mortgage. He tells me I am bitter, but he is the only one who shows bitterness.
The holidays were nice, but he got the kids on Christmas afternoon and then had them for 9 days. I hate not seeing my kids for that long. My sister and her family came up during the holiidays though, and they kept me company.
Unpacking....well that is still a work in progress, lol. However, this was the first year I brought a fake tree, so that went up right away! I will be back in school on Monday. I felt like my month break flew by! I'm doing ok, thanks for asking. I joined a gym as I would like to take off a lot of weight. Plus I always feel sluggish so I am hoping exercise will make me feel better. Thanks for asking about me, How was your holidays?
He's the bitter one and you know what? I wouldn't let it bother me.
I'm glad you had company over the holidays, but sorry the boys weren't w/you.
Yes, it's been pretty cold here and Washington, DC hasn't fared any better...cold, cold, cold, but a heat wave is coming this week....48 on Thursday!
The holidays for me were very quiet, but nice. Enjoy spending time w/family and friends, but I also liked my "me" time too.
Please take care of yourself!
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
So your X went out and tried on some big boy pants. Good for him. Too bad he had to roll the legs up so far and wrap the belt around twice to hold them up. What a total TOOL.
Like others have said - Look how great you are handling everything without the person you just knew you couldn't live without. Yes, your house, your home, your life all working out so well - and he can't find any other way to act out over his pityful life than to try dragging the welfare of the kids in and witholding his obligations. What a total TOOL.
Do what you know you have to do in the courts. See if they can make him cover some of the filing costs while they're at it. In my state if they don't pay and you push hard enough, they get picked up and have to cover the debt to get out of lock up. If he ain't happy now, see how he feels missing payday and showering with Bubba. He knows these things. He has heard others tell their sad story. He is just pushing the limits because he believes he is above doing the right thing and responsible to no one - certainly not you.
It's all up to him and NOT your fault; unless you let him. You let him step on you with his left foot, he's going to want to use both feet as fast as he can. Boundaries!
Enjoy school, enjoy the house, enjoy the kids and living your Better Life.
I am doing fine! I am just amazed how far you have come! I don't blame you for never wanting him you life again. He's lost his marbles and is miserable. Oh well, you now what they say, misery loves company,,,,I guess thats why the ow is with him!! LOL
