I just wish he'd snap out of it already... it's annoying.
PATIENCE my young Padawan.
Me: 38 H: 35 S4, S5, S10 Bomb 01/07 Wanted D - nothing would change his mind Numerous A's prior to D bomb; EA prior/during D bomb Piecing 04/07 Deployed for a year 05/07 Still Piecing 2010 M 11 yrs 05/10
I really wanted to smack him with iron this morning.
I don't think this could be justified as self defense.
Me: 38 H: 35 S4, S5, S10 Bomb 01/07 Wanted D - nothing would change his mind Numerous A's prior to D bomb; EA prior/during D bomb Piecing 04/07 Deployed for a year 05/07 Still Piecing 2010 M 11 yrs 05/10
I just wish he'd snap out of it already... it's annoying.
PATIENCE my young Padawan.
I know. I know I need patience. I wish I could shut it off..
I feel much better than I did. I have had a busy day at the office and spoke to my sister earlier (she didn't know what was going on) and I feel so much better now.
M: 32 H: 34 S:5 D: 3 D: 1 Together 11 years Married 7 Bomb: PA/EA 8/13/09 (for 1 year on and off) ILYBINILWY: 08/09
"The end of suffering happens with the end of wanting." -Laura Munson
Last night, I was supposed to go for drinks with my SIL to discuss a new business we're forming but the weather is crappy and she was running late, so I told her we'd do it another night. I was exhausted anyway. I had text H to tell him and he replied back, why are you going out with SIL? then texts to discuss biz? and I said yup and that was it. he had also called me earlier in the day but I ignored his call. He didn't leave a message, so I figured it wasn't important.
When I got home, he was cooking and MIL was there. We sat and ate (the 3 of us) had good conversation, laughs. just friendly or whatever. At one point, I absentmindly put my legs on his lap and sort of caught myself but didn't want to seem too obvious and just left them there. He didn't do or say or mind it.
I also heard him talking on the phone to a few old friends who started a new venture on their own and are very successful in. Something MIL and I had urged H to do YEARS ago but he was so caught up in his own business at the time that was flourishing, that there wasn't time for that. So he seemed hopeful? I don't know.
I went to bed (was exhausted after a long day and night yesterday) and that was that.
Woke up feeling better this morning.
M: 32 H: 34 S:5 D: 3 D: 1 Together 11 years Married 7 Bomb: PA/EA 8/13/09 (for 1 year on and off) ILYBINILWY: 08/09
"The end of suffering happens with the end of wanting." -Laura Munson
Glad you're feeling better about things! Truly all you can do is try to stay positive. Keep living life -- taking care of you & the kids & keeping H in your life as much as he seems to want to be there. You can't fix him or his issues for him. You can just work on changing things that you may feel could be changed for the better and show H what he will be losing if he does end up leaving.
He's still living there w/ you, right?
Me: 38 H: 35 S4, S5, S10 Bomb 01/07 Wanted D - nothing would change his mind Numerous A's prior to D bomb; EA prior/during D bomb Piecing 04/07 Deployed for a year 05/07 Still Piecing 2010 M 11 yrs 05/10
You can't fix him or his issues for him. You can just work on changing things that you may feel could be changed for the better and show H what he will be losing if he does end up leaving.
Great advice! I second that!
I cannot complain for not receiving from others, that which I've never asked them for.
Glad you're feeling better about things! Truly all you can do is try to stay positive. Keep living life -- taking care of you & the kids & keeping H in your life as much as he seems to want to be there. You can't fix him or his issues for him. You can just work on changing things that you may feel could be changed for the better and show H what he will be losing if he does end up leaving.
He's still living there w/ you, right?
Yup, he is still there.
Called me this morning telling me about the new car we're getting (we're trading my truck in and it'll be a wash, so we don't have to put any money down and it'll cut the payment in half)...it would be in his name and under his credit.
so we shall see what happens.. I'm trying to not think about anything really. Just focused on myself and the kids.
M: 32 H: 34 S:5 D: 3 D: 1 Together 11 years Married 7 Bomb: PA/EA 8/13/09 (for 1 year on and off) ILYBINILWY: 08/09
"The end of suffering happens with the end of wanting." -Laura Munson
Called me this morning telling me about the new car we're getting (we're trading my truck in and it'll be a wash, so we don't have to put any money down and it'll cut the payment in half)...it would be in his name and under his credit.
Ummm... hang on here Time. Okay, I get what you were saying earlier about this being his way to try and help solve some issues - that your payments will be cut in half so it will relieve some money stress possibly. However... was the truck in your name? And on your credit? I am VERY concerned about YOUR vehicle being under HIS name!! I'm not trying to scare you, but that means he could take it away from you! And it's doing absolutely nothing for your credit history. I fear that given his erratic actions as of late, this could be very harmful to you as it puts you more under his 'control'. What are your thoughts around that. Is there not a part of you that is already registering this as a concern? There has to be... you specifically mention it so your subconscious is processing it.
Please excuse if I'm not understanding a bigger picture - do you have another car that is in your name? I think it's very very important that at least one of your vehicles is.
I cannot complain for not receiving from others, that which I've never asked them for.
Called me this morning telling me about the new car we're getting (we're trading my truck in and it'll be a wash, so we don't have to put any money down and it'll cut the payment in half)...it would be in his name and under his credit.
Ummm... hang on here Time. Okay, I get what you were saying earlier about this being his way to try and help solve some issues - that your payments will be cut in half so it will relieve some money stress possibly. However... was the truck in your name? And on your credit? I am VERY concerned about YOUR vehicle being under HIS name!! I'm not trying to scare you, but that means he could take it away from you! And it's doing absolutely nothing for your credit history. I fear that given his erratic actions as of late, this could be very harmful to you as it puts you more under his 'control'. What are your thoughts around that. Is there not a part of you that is already registering this as a concern? There has to be... you specifically mention it so your subconscious is processing it.
Please excuse if I'm not understanding a bigger picture - do you have another car that is in your name? I think it's very very important that at least one of your vehicles is.
I agree with everything PG said. If the truck is in your name or both of your names, DO NOT put the new vehicle in his name only. Period.
