Wow, a couple of you called it right. W sent me a text that said "what if I didn't want a divorce". My response was "I dont know, why". She text back saying "I don't know I was just thinking about it". I left it at that, and didn't respond.
She then called the next day telling me that she was thinking about coming home. I told her it was her choice because I never told you to leave, and that was all that was mentioned of that.
I agree that once she realized that I was done trying to fight for my marriage she now doesn't want to lose everything we have. I don't know if this is real or what. I think she knows I'm going to be fine without her. I have taken care of all the household duties by myself. I have also been making the most of my free time, and having fun.
Right now I'm not sure if I want her back. Untill the other day we hadn't spoke in over a week, and I was fine with that. I will not make any decisions right now, and will just sit back and see what happens.
Paul
me 34 W 37 three kids 9 13 17 married 14 years together 15 well the bomb has been dropped a few times most recent was early June
W was at our house when I got home from work Sunday. My oldest S called me when I was leaving work saying that mom was home watching tv in our room. What's even stranger is that she hasn't slept in our room in over a month.
I had already made plans to help S run a couple of errands after I got off work. After I took care of S I went to a friends house to watch a fight he recorded the previous week. I got home a little after eleven, and W was asleep in our bed. Part of me wanted to sleep in another room, but everything I have read says don't move out of the bedroom, so I slept in our bed.
After I woke up I asked her if she plans on staying at the house and she said she would like to. I told her that would be a good idea considering the kids will be home soon. She says that she doesn't want to fight with me anymore, and I told her I agreed and didn't want to fight with her either.
I had to leave before she did and as I was walking out door W came up to me and gave me and says she wants to call a truce. I said that sounds good and put my hand out to shake hers, and she grabbed me and hugged me, and the kissed me.
Part of me was thinking, this is not a good idea, but still let it happen. I have been longing for female companionship, and considered taking calling in late to work, but decided not to.
I also don't want to send the wrong message to her either. I know this is the best possible outcome that the kids could hope for.
I'm glad she's at home, but I know that nothing has been resolved. I want to tell her that if she is wanting a relationship me that things will have to change. I'm just not sure that I'm 100% into the marriage.
I guess the best thing is to just sit back and watch and not have any expectations from any of this. I will not tolerate the same treatment that she has been giving me the past seven weeks. I'm not sure what kind of boundaries I can or should set to make sure this moves in a positive direction.
Any advice would be appreciated.
Thanks Paul
me 34 W 37 three kids 9 13 17 married 14 years together 15 well the bomb has been dropped a few times most recent was early June
I'm glad she's at home, but I know that nothing has been resolved. I want to tell her that if she is wanting a relationship me that things will have to change.
Then I strongly suggest you communicate that, and also listen to HER and her what's changed her HER thinking. Because it sounds like she's hoping to just slide back in, say "Truce!" and everything's okay, and you'll both be right back to the same dysfunctions within your marriage.
If you have any boundaries, now would be the time to lay them out, Paul.
