Just want to say good luck to everyone in their quest for a better and more fullfilling marriage. Last night my wife and I had another fight like we do most times when we talk now and she said she's done - for good. No more trying. Hates her life with me and she's been miserable the entire marriage - says it's all been bad. I know it isn't a bluff. We are done. I expect I will be getting an official divorce proposal in the next couple weeks.
I feel OK. I'm comfortable that I tried my best. I'm dissapointed but comfortable with the fact I failed. She is right that our marriage and family life is very unsatifactory. I've come to realize/feel that I don't have much left to give and that I've lost most of my feelings for her. It is best we part.
Sorry to read this, I was really pulling for you. Not much in the way of advice, but I wish you the best. From what I have seen from some friends who have gone through this, it might get worse before it gets better, but it will get better so hang in there.
CB
Me; 42, W; 43 M; 16 yrs S12, D9
3/13 - "I want to move to XYZ City (four hours away) and it might be without you, not sure" 5/13 - "Not sure I meant that"
Unfortunatly this will make me a 2 time looser. I've been thru it before and it was really nasty but there were kids and custody and that type of stuff involved. This time there will be mostly just the house to deal with and the financial implications of that, and I'm willing to walk from it with basically nothing. We've always kept our finances seperate - we have no shared credit cards or bank accounts so that part shouldn't be all that difficult.
I'm hopeful that she/we can be rational and professional about this and just deal with it on a businss type level as apposed to an emotional one. I am confident that I can. She's really angry and emotional so we'll see but she's been thru it twice herself before so is familiar with the process. If we can "work together" and not try to screw each other over I think we can part without us both being financially ruined. If not and the house goes into forclosure I think we are both screwed financially and credit wise.
Biggest impact really IMO is going to be on my daughter. My wife is the only "mother" that my daughter has really known as her real Mom isn't around. She's 9 now. I'm going to need to pay particular attention to her during and after this transition.
