I just wanted to take this of tal's thread as she obviously didn't want it on there.
I can understand your bitterness at what you have gone through. The injections I have into my neck are into the epidural region and I have always been made fully aware of how delicate the procedure is and the complications that can arise. I am so wary of epidural injections and pain relief in general that I refused any pain relief when having all of my four children. That should indicate to you how bad the pain in my neck is, that I take such huge amounts of medicaton for it.
Things over the pond here seem a bit different re litigation - we are nowhere near as quick to litigate.
However, there are good and bad doctor's out there, just as there are patients who will try and get whatever they can out of the system without a care for the actual caring health staff involved. They seem to just assume an insurance company deals with it and they do not consider the greater implications.
On a personal note, I would say the GP that put me on co-codamol at the age of 14 was wrong. It wasn't until much later in life I actually saw neurologists and spinal specialists. I have been addicted to them for years and as you probably know, that type of medication can cause headaches in itself. That masks and complicates trying to get to the route cause of my problems. A busy GP will often just top up a prescription if the patient seems happy with things. It has taken much pushing and delving to get to the point that I am at now. I do agree though that it is a partnership between the doctor and the patient....but often things go unexplored or are left for a variety of reasons.
I am sorry that your experience was so sour and devastating but there are cases when action is justified.
Saffie me 46 H 46 M in 1986 D20,D18,S16,D13 H's A 01/05 to 07/06 H recommitted to M 07/06 renewed vows 09/06 Going from strength to strength
And for the record, heck yes there are doctors who can turn into "dr. feel good-write something and get her out of here" mode, and that stinks, and there 's the whole other side where there is so much "anti-med" pressure against ANY opioids for people with some real pain. As hospital legal counsel I saw both extremes, and there is a law in our state that gives pain patients certain rights. That state law SOMETIMES gets the docs in trouble with the feds, via the DEA, and that all just turns it into a legal circus with the doctor afraid of going to jail or losing his license, whichever way he goes, and the poor patient saying wtf? Can I get some damn help?
But yeah, I felt I saw a pattern on the thread of whining, that seemed to be a pattern in some lives as well, and my feathers got a bit ruffled when a little "pile on" started against docs, BUT dang, I did apologize for my bias up front, and the interrupting of the thread. People jump on docs all the time to bitch and moan and then not even know the name of their med....
I don't see myself as "bitter" about the med mal lawsuit thing in general, but it was a big drag. OTOH God knows what would have been worse is if h HAD really hurt someone...that would really suck and h is human so there's a real chance that someday, he will.
But I do remember the sleazy process server acted like she knew me from high school (??) and told our then d8 y/o to get me out of the shower. So I go to the door all wet, with a towel and robe and she hands me the legal notice and the d8 said "is that an invitation?" (Yeah, sort of). Normally this is something that is served on the hospital counsel, and not the doctor at his home to his family...and I should know.
I've worried about lawsuits as a cost of doing business, but this particular case was so crazy and unwarranted, H didn't even recall the patient as it was almost 2 years ago, literally. And the wife of the patient was a nurse...so wth?? She had to know my h's work had nothing to do with her h's problems (morbid obesity and prostate cancer which spread, and lead to having his testes removed....so umm, come on, it was not the epidural that messed up the sex life, please) and yet...here we were, missing work and paying out some big bucks defending and spending a fortune...TO WIN the dang thing... just thought a little feedback was in order but then, I was in a grouchy mood to start with....OH WELL....
RE: Your pain issues ---Have you heard of spinal cord stimulators? Somewhat new, (and pricey BUT some of the makers will work with you to get advertising on their behalf, fyi) but very helpful for selected patients. Much better than a TENS unit, but sort of similar in theory. (And I liked my TENS unit anyhow.) They're much less invasive than spinal "surgeries", you can have them temporarily placed so that if you don't like it, it's no big deal to remove them, and they have given great results in clinical trials.
With the stimulators being less invasive, and fewer meds needed, it's a possible 'win win'. H implants them, but the higher the disc, the weirder it gets. Which disc is it for you? More than one? Yikes. Good luck on that. He does interventional pain med (anesthesiologist originally) and there are a lot of options that were developed literally the past 5 - 10 years so who knows? There may be hope for your sitch. It sounds as if you've had enough of it all.
And a GP prescribing that at age 14, (?) wow... Of course, there are probably 10 million kids that age who would LOVE to know that doc's name. Well, thanks for not slamming me!
Anyhooooos, I have seen your name and sitch before, btw. Been here since '06 and am I am in piecing, thank God. I'll have to go re-read your posts as I definitely recall your name. j-
M: 57 H: 60 M: 35 yrs S30,D28,D19 H off to Alaska 2006 Recon 7/07- 8/08 *2016* X = "ALASKA 2.0" GROUND HOG DAY I File D 10/16 OW DIV 2/26/2018 X marries OW 5/2016
My probs are c1 to c6......and of course the higher it is the more of a problem. I also use my tens machine quite a bit, but I just can't get it positioned high enough often. I shall have to look into those spinal chord stimulators.
What happened to you really sucked and folks like that guy really are pariahs.
Saffie me 46 H 46 M in 1986 D20,D18,S16,D13 H's A 01/05 to 07/06 H recommitted to M 07/06 renewed vows 09/06 Going from strength to strength
could you step over to miracl3s (sp?) thread and take a look? I was really trying to get thru to him. In fact, I was brutally honest and blunt with him. He didn't get it though. At all. Said the same thing over in his next post.
His posts actually go back to June '07, which surprised me. They all say the same thing over and over. W isn't happy, wants out of the M, sends out her red flares b/c her needs are not met, he "doesn't help out", he "lacks motivation/passion", etc. He asks us what to DO, But is himself "doing" nothing and he says he "wonders" himself if he really wants to...(which kind of makes me think that his W is on to something about the lack of motivation/passion...??) Oh, and He hasn't gotten around to reading the DB book(s), or "Five LLs", or any of the ones recommended or actions suggested, 20 months ago... But the titles of his threads are filled with despair and he's "in agony"(?) etc. Seems like cognitive dissonance; or maybe he's saying what he thinks he should say, but doesn't really do anything about.(?)
Anyhow, I've been pretty impatient this week and think maybe your eyes will see it differently, [i][b[/i]]OR[/b] maybe I'm a genius (!) and you'll validate my perceptions and echo them, and he can hear it from two people!
Oh, h was rear ended by a drunk driver on Friday and his neck is hurting. Getting an MRI and work up as we speak, though no impingement symptoms (radiating down the arms, etc. ) so far. More like pulled muscle we hope. Thing is, h UNDERSTATES pain in himself hugely. One time he said he had "kind of a bad headache" but guess what? He had meningitis. Few months ago, H had a "sore foot" and finally got it x-rayed...and it was fractured. So if he says his neck "really hurts" I worry. Yeah, I know. H is a doctor. Go figure.
Hoping YOUR neck and back are feeling better. Never underestimate the healing power of hot water (I love my hot tub and it does help the back pain--L-5/S-1 for me). If your pain is getting worse, do check out the spinal cord stimulators as well as some other devices that are using electrical means, radio frequecny, laser, and other methods to help.
(( j ))
M: 57 H: 60 M: 35 yrs S30,D28,D19 H off to Alaska 2006 Recon 7/07- 8/08 *2016* X = "ALASKA 2.0" GROUND HOG DAY I File D 10/16 OW DIV 2/26/2018 X marries OW 5/2016
I went over and left a post. I had also been very puzzled by him when I first posted to him earlier on that thread. The time line thing etc just didn't add up.
I think you are spot on in your posts - I have just tried to temper the message down a bit and see if he bites....but some people are beyond help......as you probably realise I have been feeling recently from some other posts I know you have read that I made!!!!
Some people get held in this limbo place and just don't seem able to move on....it's painful to watch.
I hope your H's neck turns out to not be something too bad. I know that whiplash just by itself can be very painful. Is he better laying down flat?
Take care
Saffie me 46 H 46 M in 1986 D20,D18,S16,D13 H's A 01/05 to 07/06 H recommitted to M 07/06 renewed vows 09/06 Going from strength to strength
I've never posted to you before. And I probably don't deserve it, but I was wondering if you'd add your two cents to my thread, "Daring to love my husband."
I've been separated since May, and my H is taking me to a "settlement conference" tomorrow to try and settle things before he files, and I am frightened. I know I should not be, but I am.
do you have a lawyer? Getting a lawyer, does NOT hurt your chances of a recon b/c maybe it'll POSSIBLY wake the h up about what the costs are and maybe he'll see you with respect if it's a 180'. Regardless, at a legal conference you need a lawyer and you need ot have some boundaries.
Please sign NOTHING without an attorney seeing it and please hire one if you have not done so before. I've never heard of a woman going it alone to "get along with h" and "not make him mad" (b/c what would he do if he got mad, leave you? Oh wait, he already is...) AND getting her h to stay with her. I'm not talking about taking him to the cleaners, though that does motivate some men to try again. But don't roll over as it does not make you more attractive to him and if you have children, you owe it to THEM to get treated fairly, so you won't regret a big mistake, later in life.
Sending positive thoughts your way... j-
M: 57 H: 60 M: 35 yrs S30,D28,D19 H off to Alaska 2006 Recon 7/07- 8/08 *2016* X = "ALASKA 2.0" GROUND HOG DAY I File D 10/16 OW DIV 2/26/2018 X marries OW 5/2016
Hi Saffie, I have been reading your posts on "that thread", I tried many times to no avail, at first I got the nice replies but then it all went south. So well done for trying and it was also encouraging to me that someone else thought the same as me! I was beginning to think I was the only one. Maybe 25 will have better luck although true to form I have no expectations. I also worry about the views on dating-she doesn't, just knows and falls head over heels, hmmm didn't I read a book that says something about if a thing isn't working try something else. Ah well just wanted to thank you for making me feel a little more normal and not a total b***h.
