Yes, I'm a Barbie GAL! I had a life prior to the disintegration of my M but I put it on hold for a while so I could pick up my pieces. But I'd really like to talk about GETTING A LIFE!!!! It is SO important to work on this and make the best life you can for you and yourself. Because last time I looked - God only gave us one shot at it. I intend to make mine great.
Did you see the Bucket List? Did you read 1000 places to visit or 1000 things to do before you die? Well, I started a list a while back. In fact - about 5 years ago it appeared on my thread. And others added to it. And I put some of the things down that I hoped to do. I can tell you - I've made progress. There are lots of things I have yet to do. Some are in the works. Some will take more planning. I don't like to think of them as things I will do before I die. Because I want to focus on LIVING!
I hoped to have a new man in my life - preferably tall, dark and handsome. Ok, I can't say that he is tall (he is taller than me) but he has a full head of dark, curly hair and he is handsome. I am SO lucky to have him. But the looks mean nada. He is kind and I love him. That is my biggest step forward. And in less than 10 days it will be 4 1/2 years for us!
I wanted to see a moose in the wild and did. I wanted to see a manatee in the wild and did (an attractive DB male friend took me to see one in his home state). I wanted to drive Pacific Coast highway in its entirety. So far I have done San Diego as far north as Santa Barbara and Big Sur to San Francisco. So - I've done most of it.
I wanted to visit Carmel. Josh took me there as a surprise. I LOVED it! I wanted to go to Napa and Sonoma - DONE!
I have had a lifelong dream to visit Australia. So has Josh. Today we spent a long time planning out this trip of a lifetime. We will be leaving on his birthday, right after Christmas and fly to Sydney in time to see the New Year's Eve Fireworks over Sydney harbour. Our month away will include a Princess cruise to ports in Australia, Tasmania and New Zealand. A bit of touring in NZ post cruise then we'll fly to Cairns to cross off one of my greatest dreams - snorkelling the Great Barrier Reef! We still need to determine our adventure following that. It might be another one on my list - Hot Air Ballooning. Our trip will include a few more things on my list that involve seeing wildlife in their natural habitat - koalas, kangaroos and the duckbilled platypus.
OK, enough about the trip. Still lots to decide on and book. But I want to talk about wishing, hoping, dreaming and planning. We all have them. And some we will make real. And some we won't. But if you prioritize and keep your expectations in perspective - many dreams can be made a reality. You can work towards your GAL goals by breaking them down into little steps. And then taking a small step in that direction. Like starting a special savings or looking at ways of achieving a dream. Some of it is just pure luck (like the time I saw the moose with my sister). Being in the right place at the right time.
So I've told you some of the things I've worked on to GAL. And some of the things on my TO DO list. What are your goals? What is on your TO DO list? What can you do today to take a step towards making that happen?
About that hot air balloon - may I recommend a sunset ride over the desert in Phoenix? It was awesome.
And last night I lived out another serious GAL dream. I got to hang out backstage with one of my favorite musicians, and watch his band and then Devo perform while I stood off to the side of the stage. (Yes, this nerdy middle-aged mom got to be one of the "cool kids" standing on the side of the stage! :>) )
(Devo still rocks, btw, although there is something just WRONG about gray hair peeking out from a flower-pot hat. How did we get to be so OLD?)
Some of my new goals? - learn to play a new instrument - I was thinking maybe the clarinet that my D left behind from her middle-school band days.
I LOVE your goals! I was with you nearly 2 years ago when I did part of that Pacific coast drive!
Hot Air Ballooning! I attempted it 3 times in Orlando with fellow DB pal, Pearl. We had to get up at 5 each day. And each time the weather was not suitable and the balloon did not go up! Then Josh tried to book it as a birthday surprise for me during our California trip. (when I met Survial Goddess with him). It would fly over Napa! But that was when the flooding was happening so he took me to Carmel instead. I will look into your suggestion. I am thinking that a trip to Sonoma needs to be on my list.
So you got to see Devo! WAY COOL! I remember teaching a routine to "Whip It" a few years back. One of my best works. Yep - they rock!
I, too, have always wanted to write a book. The "Lemonade" series (seriously). About overcoming life's most difficult upheavels. Like Ryan and Chuck.
And I'd love to visit Ireland. Especially since I saw "P.S. I Love You". It looks incredible.
Raising 3 happy, healthy children into successful, considerate adults. That was one of my main goals in life. I worried how the divorce might affect them. 7 years later - let's take a look.
Ryan, severely disabled following a viral encephalitis at age 4.5. He is now 29 years old. Lives here at home with me. Is looked after 12 hours per day by personal support workers. He is healthy and happy. Yes, I lost the handicapped accessible home we had built for his comfort but the new house has plenty of room for him and I recently added an elevator to improve his accessibility (he had limited mobility on stairs) and to keep his workers out of the main part of the house. YEAH - I have my house back!
Brandon was 19 and about to start his first year of college when his dad suddenly left. He changed schools to stay home and help me. And he was incredible! Lived at home the next 2 years, being like a dad to his sis and helping with Ryan. He graduated from hotel management and started a career in the business. After a couple of years he decided to get a second education and spent another year at a private recording arts school. He then moved to Toronto and is currently working in the business. Big plans at present are his annual wilderness camping/canoe trip with friends. They'll spend before and after at the cottage and move on to Algonquin for a week.
Ashley became a teenager the day after 9-11. Her dad had just moved out. What a devestating way to begin that tough phase. We've had our ups and downs together. Many extreme highs - she is a talented girl full of life and ambition. And many extreme lows - what teenage girl isn't a basket of emotions and hormones. Never a dull moment. Agony, stress, you name it. And of course, wanting the best for her - I feel everything that she feels a thousand times over. Lately she has been working with Ryan (yes she gets paid) and has cared for him at night while I have been away (for which I am grateful and also compensate her). She is starting her first fulltime job today at a tech support call in center, making good money and will finish her college courses online this year (she only needs 4 more credits to graduate). She still plans to further her education in the field of nutrition out of town next year.
So, all in all - 3 kids have survived the Big D along with me. Affected by it? Oh yes - majorly. But letting them figure out how to handle situations as they arose and offering them unconditional love and support with access to counselling as needed has worked for us. This is not the family life I had planned for them - but I have done my best.
Communication with your kids is key. Listen when they need to talk. Leave them be when they don't. Email them, leave little notes, just remember how much you love them. They might pretend they don't like it or don't notice - but they need the support.
Communication with your kids is key. Listen when they need to talk. Leave them be when they don't. Email them, leave little notes, just remember how much you love them. They might pretend they don't like it or don't notice - but they need the support.
Thank you for this Barb. I get so terrified at times. Then I remember what i am scared of the most usually smacks me in my face. I need to learn how to breathe better.
As for traveling, I will live vicariously thru you for now. Till I meet that very handsome, and ver rich 99 year old that is deaf and mute, bless his heart.
Ellie that sounds like a dream. Devo, the ride in Phoenix.
I hope you ladies do get to write those books.
Live Simply Love Generously Care Deeply Speak Kindly Leave the rest to God
Lissie, you are doing a fab job with your kids. No doubt in my mind or in theirs, I'm sure. Still, it is not easy being a single mom. Just wait till your little girl is a teen - now that's the toughest in my experience. But we all survive!
I dreamed I left on a month long trip (the one planned with Josh after Christmas) and did not pack or pay my bills. (OK, I'm leaving for Iowa tommorrow and did not pack yet or get U.S. $). It was not so wonderful. I had to go home and get ready all over again. Weird dream.
Some day I will write. For now my artistic pursuits are tiny.
Sun shines today and I'm seing a bit of colour in the park behind my house. It will only get better over the next month
Yesterday started with a possible disaster but was handled well. The new nurse we trained for 2 days last week pulled out. Her first shift was to be yesterday afternoon. Normally this would have sent me into shockwaves. But my morning nurse told me she could pick up the afternoon shift if I let her take Ryan to college with her. I agreed and was SO grateful. SHe and my other nurse have picked up the extra shifts for the next week or 2, taking the pressure off of me. Not sure what I'd do without them. She is pregnant, though, and will be on maternity leave in a couple of months. Still, I am so happy she made my life easier.
So today it is back to the drawing board. An ongoing process in my life. The agency wants me to hire a guy, but I'm not so sure. I wonder about my comfort level having a guy in the house and around Ashley. She is older now so maybe it won't be an issue. And a guy could be stronger and more able to assist Ryan. So I agreed to meet the guy in question later this morning and decide from there. We had a guy a few years back and he was just creepy. He would come 2 hours early and hang out in my neighbourhood because he liked it. I didn't like that at all!
Taking my lifelong best friend out for lunch after the interview. I'm so lucky to have her in my life still. It is always a pleasure! I need to go wrap her gift.
And I guess I should pack later to go to Iowa so I don't have any weird dreams like last night. I realized that I left my fav pair of jeans at the cottage so that has me a bit miffed. However, I was also thinking of shopping today for a fall outfit - maybe some sage casual pants and an autumn coloured print top. I did get 2 new sweaters and a pareo last week. So I'm on a roll.
Hope the sun is shining where you are as it is here. What are your plans today?
