We were talking on my thread about the U.S.A. Men's Gold champ (I think his name is Michael). Anyway, his dad had ditched the family - him and his sisters a number of years ago. His dad has NOT been there throughout. He walked his sister down the aisle at her wedding. Now he must watch this enormous success of a young man win gold several times over for his country. And he was not part of that success. Kudos to Mom!
I used to hear that most affairs that led to marriages did not last. In my experience - that is not so common. Maybe I just haven't waited long enough. A number of us here have seen our exes marry their OP. We want to hear they're unhappy. But we really don't hear much of what's going on with them at all. And we're better off for it no doubt. Do we wish them well? Not most of us (well not me, that's for sure). Do I hope their M does not last and they end up with someone else? Yes. That I can live with.
So - what about Karma? What has happened to people you know of who have cheated and lied - broke hearts and destroyed families. What about OP?? Shouldn't karma bite them in the ass too?
Well I'll take a mojito too! (Man I love the things!)
So I have a question back for y'all, why hold onto all the negative, bitter feelings? It seems pretty counter productive to our own healing, our own happiness, our own lives.
As for Karma, I firmly believe we reap what we sew. If you hold negative feelings you'll get negative results.
If we really want to love, we must learn how to forgive. - Mother Theresa
Well, I have been reading and lurking for a while....then I saw that there were Mojito's here, so I had to log in!!! I do believe we reap what we sew. Do I want my X to be happy with his marriage to OW....eh, don't really care. I am sure it is not the bed of roses he expected, but that's his problem not mine. I do know that I will never be friends with them, and that is my choice. I can forgive, but I don't forget.
"You can't stop the waves, but you can learn to surf." Jon Kabat-Zinn
I believe in Karma, however, at this point it really doesn't matter to me if X gets his. Personally, I hate to see anyone suffer so if karma means X getting a horrible disease and dieing a slow painful death....NO!!! I don't even like the fact that he's suffering financially. Whatever happens to them affects our kids in some way.
And...I've found that when I am able to let go of the anger/resentment I feel towards X, my life is happier. Yes, it crops up occasionally and that's how I know that my life is happier when I let it go. I was angry during most of my M, I'm not going to allow it to affect the rest of my life.
In my case, the karma is that "I" got what "I" deserve.
OH Barb! Love this, just last week I emailed my friends about this very subject. Said it was something I was doubting big time -- Know that it dosnt/shouldnt matter to us what and if karma hits our exs, but lets face it, we are human and well I have to admit , I kinda like the idea! lol call me evil lol not pain or death just well maybe a lil broken heart or some fin probs that he left me with???
My ex is in Cabo now, soaking up the sun w/ his chickie in his time share, maybe w/ her kids, while my S and I sit here and do wonder where all the family vacations where when he was young???
Guess ex was storing up his vacation time to take w/ his new fam. I feel bad for S, but do hope one day he will take fab trips w/ HIS family! and I am eager to travel w/ B
But karma, aint happening so far w/ my ex i tell ya, not from what any of us can see. Life is good, works good, hes w/ his chickie still, vacations up the wing wang, his S still associates w/ him. Nice car.No home of his own yet, but he never cared much for that kinda thing anyway--
He is just waiting for me to sell to collect some more money from this house So hes doing ok. Maybe 6 yrs is not long enough. As long as he helps Ry when needed, i'll let him be and not put an evil hex on him. lol
Last edited by KarenMarieS; 08/13/0801:50 AM.
Be Happy for this Moment, This Moment is your Life
I really don't think about ex all the time. Nor do I wish him and his OW bad. Cause I just don't think about it. Or make trouble for them either. Cause I just don't care.
But, like Karen, I am human. I would be happier if they split and he was with someone else. Because then my kids would spend more time with him since they do not tolerate maggot and will not go to his house or go on vacation with their dad because of her.
Karma...
I have a friend whose H left her 2 years ago. Major MLC. Very pushy ow (so much like maggot). Then he got cancer (and NO - I do not wish that on either my ex OR maggot or ANYONE).OW pushed very hard for his divorce and her marriage to him. I encouraged my friend NOT to divorce him. Especially under the circumstances. She did not. OW was furious. My friend and her kids had to visit him in hospital with OW there as well. Very uncomfortable. I heard from her today. One year today since Mike's death. She and the kids visited his grave, took flowers. OW not heard from anymore. Guess she didn't get the money and run. She just ran. Probably moved on to her next "quest".
wow Barb and dosnt that show you who is REALLY there for you when you need them? I wonder how many of the OW would stick by their men in times like that??
Be Happy for this Moment, This Moment is your Life
