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Hi Dar,

Maybe he doesn't want you and D to write letters as much as he wanted to give you his address and let you know where he's living. Maybe he's trying to be more open. Maybe he was using it as an excuse to call.

Try to think positive!

In the end, it doesn't matter "why" he did this and spending your day trying to figure it out is fruitless. Just accept it for what it was and go forward enjoying your day.


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You're so right Farmtown! I didn't think of it that way! Thank you for helping me see another way.

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OH! And I forgot to mention earlier about another part of the conversation yesterday.... when he told me that he didn't think it was a big deal that I didn't have his address, he then said "plus, it's still a strong possibility that I'll be moving back in with dad or somewhere else anway".

Or somewhere else????? Driving me to drink! \:\)

Last edited by darboyd5; 05/01/08 07:40 PM.
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Hi Dar,

Did you ask him where this somewhere else might be? In a conversation with my XH last summer, he said something similar about moving out of his current place.

I asked him, "Where are you going?" He said, "Home, if that's still a possibility." I told him it was, but that we needed to talk more about it. Well, that's as far as it went. He didn't bring it up again until a couple of weeks ago and basically in the same way.

My point is that I think my XH really had no intention of moving home then or perhaps, even now, but wondered if it was still a possibility. Maybe your H is trying to feel you out. Or maybe not--you just never know.

Don't spend too much time trying to figure it out. Just try and enjoy the day--it's Friday. YIPPEE!!


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Yea, I didn't ask him. I felt if I did then he would think I was questioning him too much. Today is Friday and the only thing that would make it better is if it were a pay day! \:\)

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I can't stand this. I'm keeping track of the month to see if my hormones have anything to do with my thoughts and they seem to be for sure. I'm pretty down today and it sucks to feel like this every month. I want to make a change but I don't know how to force myself to do so. "If you don't like how things are going, change them"....I tell it to myself quite often now as a reminder. But how? I have this routine of drop off D at school, go to work, pick up D from school, get home, dinner, homework, etc. It seems there is no time to really GAL and do things for me. I wish I could scoop out the part of my brain that has H in it and that has this sadness (for lack of better word) in it too.

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(((((dar)))))

I'd say that since you have figured out the timing, you can now know that this is a good time to really concentrate on the closed mouth! I know what you mean about feeling like there's no time to change, I think we both have to work on that, and figure out how to get around it. It is holding us back!

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It's definately holding me back Jeff! I need to do things, go out, have fun, keep this f'd up mind of mine busy. I should be SOOOO much farther along than I am! I should be reconciled or divorced by now for goodness sake! I HATE that he doesn't initiate alot of contact. He's my H after all!

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Quote:
I should be reconciled or divorced by now for goodness sake!

Dar,
If you feel you should be divorced by now you could easily set that in motion. Since that is not what you want, there is no shoulda. And there is absolutely no *shoulda* as far as reconciling goes. There just isn't. There is just today. This moment. What is good about Dar's life today?

*hugs*
~ swl


Look not mournfully into the past. It comes not back again. Wisely improve the present. It is thine. Go forth to meet the shadowy future, without fear. {Henry Wadsworth Longfellow}
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Dar's life today.... I have a D that I love to pieces. I have friends and family that love me. I'm funny, kind, caring, put others first, helpful, fun. I'm getting my fave salad from Portillos for lunch today \:\) . I have the cutest dog ever! My cousin just had a baby.

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