Just listened to the VM from H. Lots of spewing.... he doesn't like it when I don't go along with what he wants.. too bad!
He says it is in the papers that I am to split the driving with him. I have to check with my L about this b/c I don't remember the papers saying this. He's the one that moved away 45 min. from his kids. I don't feel as though it is my responsibility to help him with transporting our d for his visitations. If he treated me better I might consider meeting him half way, but until he does I don't want to help him.
In his message he said that "picking up my children is a big burden!" Can you believe he said that? He went on to say that b/c it is in the papers from now on he will pick up d on Friday and I will come to pick her up from his apt on Sunday. "This is the way it is going to be from now on!!!" He spewed.... Ugh!
He then went off on me about our homeowners loan accusing me of not paying it. He says he gets 6 calls a day about it! This is all crap b/c I made arrangements with the loan co a long time ago and have been making the payments.
Now I am upset. He still gets to me. I hate it. Now what???
Remember K spewage rhymes with sewage.....just tell him you will meet him 1/2 way...and thats it. I cant believe the papers specify what he is saying. Im sorry you are hurting so much...
Me 53 H 51 OW 25 Bomb may 06 left june 8/ 06 ILYBNILWY (twice!) 7/6/07 H wants to come home 7/21/07 H comes home 7/07 -7/08 long haul letting go of OW now piecing in earnest
It's not your responsibility to deal with his choices. Of course, if he can brow beat you into doing it he feels better. You are making the right decisions here. Don't let him pull you in.
If he wants to see his d he will make the effort. He is an ass. Stay away from it and continue to make a stable place for you and your D's.
I called my L to see if it is in the papers, but he is out of town until Monday. I don't remember seeing it . I would have never agreed to that if it did.
I just don't think it should be my responsibility b/c H is the one that chose to live 45 min away.
I am going to call him back this morning to tell him that the best I can do is to meet him 1/2 way. ( I really don't even have to do that)
I agree, he is an ass. He's acting like a teenager throwing a tantrum.
When he came to pick up d last night I gave him a copy of our loan statement to show him that I was paying it. He probably just made up about getting 6 calls a day for non payment.
About picking d up this weekend.... d is upset too b/c she is worried about how she will be getting home. She knows that her dad wants me to pick her up and I told him no. I don't want her to be worrying about all of this.
I think you are doing the right thing by not giving in to H. Let him have his tantrum, because you are right, it was his choice to move 45 minutes away.
" I am just getting back to you about your message yesterday. I already told you that I will not be able to pick up d from your apt this weekend. I am really busy and the best i can do is meet you half way. It is a 45 min drive one way and it will take a good 1 1/2 hours out of my day. I'm just too busy. If you don't want to meet me half way then I guess you will be bringing her all the way home."
"You are the one that chose to live 45 min away. If you want to live closer to your kids so you don't have so much driving to do then move closer. It's your choice to live where you do."
"D does want to come home on Sat night, but if Sun morning is better for you then she will have to stay another night. Just let me know which day you will be meeting me and where. I think that XXXXX Mall is about 1/2 way."
How did that sound? He is seeing that I am stronger and not so easily manipulated anymore and he doesn't like it. I'm sure he is fuming right about now. He needs to learn that there are consequences to his decisions. He is such a baby and still expects me to cater to him.
