TMW, Thanks again for the encouraging words. X's CS is only $46 a month. And it's only that low because she is claiming some bogus expenses that I didn't fight at the time. So there's not much to reduce and I'm not going there right now anyway with the whole custody issue looming.
DD & Spit,
Thanks for the responses also. Yep - that's my theory too. Back off & give D14 time. That's really all I can do anyway - hopefully - one day things will be different and she will see things & me in a different light.
BTW - I am taking names of everyone that keeps telling me that line.
'Dog,
Glad to hear you got your C card. Great stuff. Db Dive club trip sounds like a good idea to me. I tried to get something going a while back and didn't get much of a response. But who knows.
I have a good friend who is a Dive Master in the Keys. She loves it. So maybe if we do decide to get something going we can go through her shop & get "personalized" servioce for the group.
April, You don't have to stay on dry land - most operators will let "Bubble Watchers" go along for the ride at a reduced rate. But, there's nothing wrong with having someone on land to have those frozen drinks ready for us when we get back from sucking air. You are in.
Thanks again for the kind words and encouragement. Have a busy afternoon ahead when I get off work. Lot's to do to get ready for the reunion.Luckliy I already have the dive gear packed - so that's crossed off the list.
But I'm almost ready for the run - just a few last minute errands to take care of, finish packing and load up the old truck.Friends are having a dinner party tonight so I need to wrap up as much as I can this afternooon before heading over there tonight & then leaving in the morning.
I've decided to turn off the cell phone when I get there and that I'm going to have a great time - even if it kills me.
Just got confirmation on reservation for a deep sea fishing charter one day at the reunion - so something else to look forward to. Nothing like fresh tuna on the grill!!!!!
See - there are some postives in my life - just got to let the good things happen and not dwell on the bad.
Oh my goodness. Here in Ohio there is a minimum on the child support and it's in the $200's/month. No matter what the situation is with the child or either parent, the bare minimum child support order is in the $200's. They say to send whatever you can.
I'm just in in shock and awe! $46/month!
Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.
TMW Funny isn't it? X made 60% of income - pays me that paultry sum and yet hits me for $$ every chance she can - mainly to make me look bad to D14.
But alas - those days are to soon be over.
April, Vacation was a blast. Glad I could get away for a bit and catch up with the family. Weather cooperated and got a little sun on the old great white underbelly.
NO - you can't see my tan lines
We weren't able to go diving though. While nice & sunny seas were 6-8 feet all week. So I just hugged my regs and put them back in the bag with a promised to see & use them soon.
Fishing trip went well enough though. I'll ride a boat in 6-8 ft seas - but getting in & out of a boat in those conditions is another story all together. We caught out limit of Mahi fairly quickly and that was it - trolling the rest of the day w/o a single strike. Was really hoping to put some tuna in the box. Oh well - maybe next time.
Tell me - is it wrong to find a little humor in watching your relatives turn green & "chum" all over the deck. Thank goodness for the wash-down hose onboard.
My cousin & his son are land lubbers. It didn't take long for the boy - 17yo - to take on a sickly hue & start chumming. Poor kid never saw a fish caught and stayed in the cabin most of the day. That was his mistake - he didn't take Uncle SoccerDad's advice and paid the price. At least it's a family memory that he will never forget.
Well now that this reunion is in the past it's time to start planning the next one. We do it every two years and the next one is on my immediate family to plan. Not looking forward to that part of it - but it's our turn. I'm thinking a run to the gulf Coast so we can dive - hopefully - and there's plenty to do in that area for the land lubbers.
Oh - forgot to mention that D14 called my mother while on vacation - wanted to know my plans - if I was going to be there all week. Remember - no contact between D14 & I because of CPS stuff. Told my mother that she wanted to come see "her" family and that X had offered to drive her there & pick her up - A 2 1/2 hour trip - one way.
Not sure what to think about it other than X had told D14 she would do "something special" since D14 couldn't go to reunion. Sounds like to me X backed out of her promise & is probably getting tired of having D14 24/7.
Done with FF. She went nuclear on me - still not sure why. Tried to figure it out and she got snotty and hung up on me more than once - even while trying to make arrangements to get some of her things back to her.
Don't understand it but I didn't buy a ticket on her drama train - no real loss to me anyway.
Adios Amigo - I've got better things to do.
Probably time to take a break from the dating scene for a while again.
Upcoming events: Court date on 7/24 for reckless driving warrant D14 signed out on me. OH BABY - that should be a hoot.
Still no word from CPS about investigation or X about custody. I'm sure that they (X & OM) are waiting for CPS to finish before firing the next round.
Still digging out from being gone for a week - just taking a minute while at lunch to catch up here. Got to run - catch you guys later.
Sounds like a good week. Sorry you're swamped at work now I won't be around to hear how the court thing goes on the 24th. I may give you a call that evening to get an update.
Court on Monday - found "not guilty" of reckless driving on warrant D14 took out against me.
CPS allegations determined to be "founded" to the least degree possible. Pondering if I want to appeal finding or not.Some of the "justification" for the finding are just twisting my words around to make it look like I admitted to something I didn't.
L says unlikely to change things unless I'm willing to take it all the way to a court hearing, drag D14 through it too as she would have to testify against me - again, spend a bunch of $$ doing it and more than likely lose anyway. This could mess wiht me at work & coaching - don't know what to do about this yet.
Investigation over so I can contact D14. X left message she needed some things from my house for D14.
So I called DX's house -D14 answered - told her I got message and if she wanted to & X agreed I would pick her up after work,get the stuff together & do dinner then return her to X's afterward.She said she wanted to see me. Told D14 to run it by X. Got message back from D14 - X said no.
I called D14 back - told her that I'm sorry that X feels that way but I'm not going to argue with X. That I'm not angry with her and that things will settle down eventually.
X left nasty-gram on home machine - went ballistic. Said I had taken advantage of her because she's been responsible for D14 for 2 months and I had never called to check or see if she needed anything - told me to not call again or try to make plans behind her back. And then start b*tching about $$$.
WTF
Not like I just walked away - I didn't call CPS or sign out a warrant. I called not soon after that and told her D14 left her glasses at my place and if she wanted them or anything else to call me & we could make arrangements - never heard anything.
How did I go behind her back when I told D4 to run it by her.
What a BIATCH. Maybe one day she will let go of her anger - doubt it & not holding my breath.
All the more reason to remove myself from the "daily" stuff involving D14. Nothing I do will ever be right or good enough. But then that's X's problem - not mine.
D14 did tell me the custody stuff is "in the process". Expected that and not going to fight it.And they will get everything that goes along with it.
Oh well - time to start living for me instead of trying to please D14 &/or X.
I have decided D14 & I will not try to return to "normal" visitation. I can't parent her with X in the background fanning the flames and to be honest I don't completly trust D14 any more anyway. Everything I do and or say is relayed directly to X - any little thing will be blown out of scale and I'll be charged with some BS or drug into court again.
I HAVE got to protect myself & if that means only phone contact w/ D14 so be it. I can still be involved with her w/o being involved in the daily stuff.
I'm sorry that this continues to happen in your sitch.
An idea popped into my head while reading your latest post. I wonder if you started journaling/writing to your D14 now, not necessarily sending her any of it, but merely saving it for her when she's 18. At that point, she's out of her Mom's control (legally anyway), and it might be a way to start healing the R b/t your D14 and you.
Not sending the letters/hournal now would keep your XW's reactions out of your communications to your D14. I'd keep the commentary about XW to next-to-nothing in the writing, and merely note to your D14 your love for her, goings on in your life, and hopes/thoughts related to her.
I won't be around to hear how the court thing goes on the 24th. I may give you a call that evening to get an update. 