The 24 hour text delay drives me crazy. I used to lament a lot that texting exists at all but it’s here to stay unfortunately and it is yet another way to gauge the state of your relationship. I get that some people aren’t great at texting BUT, regardless how busy I am or how bad I am at texting, if I know someone I am really interested in has reached out to me via text, I may wait 15 mins, 30 mins or an hour or two if I am really busy but I will never, ever wait 24 hours…not unless I am out of town and out of cell range. And if I am, I would pre-warn the object of my affection that I will be difficult to reach so may not reply in a timely manner. IDK…am I out to lunch here on this? I get that people don’t want to appear too eager or enthusiastic for fear of coming across as desperate and therefore becoming unattractive to the other person but isn’t 24 hours a long time to routinely wait to respond to someone. To me, this falls into the category of pay attention to what someone does rather than what they say.
Personally G… I think the pay off of getting to hang out with someone as cool as you should outweigh the torture of putting together a couple of worlds so the object of his affection isn’t irritated by his lack of response. And let’s be clear… he KNOWS it irritates you. I like that you made plans when he didn’t contact you in time. That’s teaching him how to treat you and if he cares, he will adjust his behaviour. Next time he does something he knows bothers you and then asks if you are mad at him, I would be honest with him. “No, I’m not mad BUT when I reach out to you just to say “hi” and you take more than 24 hours to respond, it makes me feel like you aren’t really that interested in spending time together and it’s disappointing because it makes me start to lose interest as well.” It’s direct, it’s honest and it challenges him to increase his efforts (if he is as interested) or be honest with you in return.
I absolutely detest all these rules and games. I 100% believe that when/if I meet the “right” person, neither of us will need to play these games. The person I want to spend time with will prefer to be direct and honest…maybe not in the first date or two but definitely after a mutual interest has been established.
Anyway…just weighing in. Really want you to find your person my friend. (((HUGS)))
