Originally Posted by Mach40
Andrew, any specific threads on dating? You have allot of threads..
LOL - yes I do. To summarize and save you some reading, I dated a couple of women who were very much less favoured economically than me. Things moved very fast in both cases, and all the people around me (and eventually me) realized that I was being taken advantage of.

In the first case, the woman called it off due in part to the fact that my house was too big and had too many stairs and I refused to sell it and buy a lake-front property. She also had a lot of unresolved issues including a ex-husband that she eventually went back to. I suspect she was having her own version of a MLC and I was rock bottom crazy He'd had multiple affairs before they split and I was assured that it was completely over. They'd been apart for multiple years but kept in touch.

In the second case I had to call it off when the woman turned out to be hoarder who expected me to take care of everything for her and her extended family. One episode that stands out was when I ended up in the hospital because of angina pains (turned out it was stress related) and she emptied the bank account buying stuff at Costco while she waited for me to get out of surgery. Oh and my house was far far too small because she couldn't have a separate office and craft room for herself and there wasn't enough room for her stuff. After we split she moved into her parent's small bungalow which she inherited just before I called it quits.

Now, I'm not saying that any disparity in economic capability is an immediate no-go. But rather the lack of reciprocity. I was married for 26 years to a woman who worked as a retail clerk. There was never a question of who contributed more to the family. We each did our part.

Going forward I can't see myself again being in a situation where finances would be combined. I'm 58 and don't want to risk my future again. And as time goes on and I spend more and more time living alone I find that I appreciate it. I used to think that I could get along with anyone and that turned out to be wrong. My friend "C" who I've been seeing a bit of lately has assured me that in her opinion that I must be hard to live with.