This may be unpleasant or an unpopular opinion, but so be it. I don't soft peddle things to my friends - aren't you lucky?

You promised your dad you'd take care of your step mother. That's admirable, but is it in fact even possible, or is your care for her even needed right now?

Doesn't matter that they were married for 40 years. Doesn't matter that it's a blended family. When all is said and done the truth is he was your dad and she is their mom. She knows you care, you've made sure of that. You've done a pretty great job of taking care of certain things for her and everyone knows that. They are circling the wagons around her, and the reasons could range from she's their mom to something more nefarious, but does it matter or change anything?

Perhaps it's time to take care of yourself. You've lost K and now you've also lost your father. That's a huge amount to unpack.

Don't you think you deserve some care and attention?

What would K say about all this, or J3B?

Think about it.