I won’t tell you what to do but believe you are wrong in saying “it won’t change anything”.
It will change your kids experience.
A friend is also going through D, not as complicated as some sitches here but with a bit of aggression and hostility. At one point my friend wasn’t speaking to his ex at all. Hardly emails.
Their seven year old daughter started having severe anxiety and sleeping problems. That all ended when they decided to be more polite/cordial during exchanges and communication.