(Btw I wasn't suggesting you reconcile - the odds of real change on his part at this point are very slim. But by having a clear picture in your head of what REAL change would look like - living apart for at least a year, him in intensive therapy and a 12 step program for both his drinking and his sex addiction, complete transparency - you can recognize the inadequacy of any half-hearted attempts on his part to get back to his comfortable life.)