((Stella)) - we've all been there and done that. Just reset the clock and keep going.
Just check out some of us "old-timers"'s early threads - I just read back to January 2017 whooo boy was I messed up. I remember calling my wife then when I realized that she'd been stringing me along and had gone to see OM. Any of the questions I demanded answers to where met with silence and weeping.
It's hard to see right now, but you're doing fine.
