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CW there's a lovely soul and I'm sure a man a whole lot of women would be happy to have

Yeah CW - you're smart, fit, self-aware, a good dad - all great things that women are looking for. Don't sell yourself short. Turn away from the red flags, do some more work, and when the time comes, look for a stable, kind, loving woman who appreciates you and doesn't bring drama and uncertainty into your life. It will feel strange, you're used to chaos, but trust me, you'll be much happier.