My parents don't live nearby, but they call daily and have visited a few times. They are going to come visit when the kids are on spring break so we can still show the kids a good time. I think I am wearing my mom and dad out too, but they always say "That's why we are here."
What fools these aliens are to leave great wives like us!!!!!
Me45 H45 D13 S10 together-23 years married-21 years MLC Divorced 10/3/07 Married to a wonderful new man.
Glad to hear of your good news. Now you can breathe a liitle better I hope. I doubt you're wearing your folks out. Trust them to let you know or if your really concerned ask. Wouldn't you do the same for one of your kids?
I would caution you not to compare your life (D or no D) to others. I used to work with a woman who had come through Cambodia in the 1970's. She lost everyone and everything (she had been a judge). Once she got here she went to school to become a C. I asked her once how she would be able to help people with (comparatively) mundane problems given her life. Her response......you can't compare tears.
So, no compairing just take it moment by moment, step by step. You'll be amazed at who you become.
Doing ok today...really want info on OW...my L said the more I have the better it is for my case... I really am trying hard to deal with H as a business associate...had to call him this morning because I did not want him to take D's tonight...I have to go to a dance costume fitting and my D broke her glasses yesterday and I need to get them fixed. Probably won't be home until about 7. H said he would p/u at 7 and keep overnight and drop off at 6:40 AM...thanks for the help! Anyway I think that is too late and too early to get the baby up and out...she goes to bed by 6:45. He will spend no time with her at all!! H should be taking them Thurs night...he won't (I bet) b/c he is taking them tonight...I am not going to say anything and then if he doesn't show I am going to call to see where he is!! I am so mad at him and the other part of me want to ask him to really think about what is going on... UGH...a guess I am a little stressed today...any ideas how to get info on OW??
OW search--You can start by doing a google search, then see if your lawyer can do this. If not, then a PI.
I did this over a year ago but it can be expensive.
The Bomb: 08/05 H moves out: 06/2006 H moves back: 01/07 & Out again: 01/07 H moves back: 03/08 & Out again: 04/08 H moves back: 05/09 & Out again: 07/09 Divorced 08-12 Kids: 22, 20, 19
I have her name..at least what I think per people that know her from H's work...that is all I have...I would like her b-day, address, phone etc... Obviously I am not very sneaky or I would have done this 3 months ago!
If your L thinks finding dirt on OW would help your filing, you need to be careful. Snooping and becoming obsessed with OP risks bringing you down from the high road.
Consider calling a private individual that specializes in such stuff. They already know which cheap internet search tactic works and which ones don't. They also have made contacts in information based places you have no access. Let them give you an explanation of what they do, and charge. Decide if you can afford to turn this over to one of them and step away from it.
It would even be nice if they said I have your dirty details and you could say give them to my L. It probably wouldn't work that way, but it would leave fewer long term mental scars for you. The more investigating you do on your own, the more negative your memories are going to become.
Think twice, step once, think twice again. Take care
My L is looking for proof of OW...I have her name but need her b-day...I really don't want to involve a PI...way too expensive....not worth it in the end.
You are right about taking the high road...I haven't done anything wrong at all..not even snooping b/c I know what I find out will not be the entire story and only fuel my madness!!
I am going through bills and H is charging up a storm...he has changed the address on the credit cards so the bill goes to his mothers instead of to me. Talk about being sneaky!
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
