I swiped this from one of Lily's threads. I hope she doesn't mind, but I wanted to repost it on mine.
"The being in love part comes and goes throughout the marriage. We just have to learn that when it goes we have to find it within ourselves to make it come back. It is not the other person's fault, it is usually what is going on inside of ourselves that makes us feel that way."---source unknown.
Another Lily swiping...but this time the poster on her thread was ANS.
He says:
I read a book about depression where the author (an SBT therapist) says that your self-talk can keep you in depression. Act/think as-if things are all wrong, and you stay depressed. Act and force yourself to think as if things are OK, and you'll come out of your depression (of course, it usually takes meds, too, but you get the idea). **********************************************************
This is something I need to keep in mind. When my bad moods start coming on, and I begin to feel that black cloud creeping in, I need to pop in my mental tape that says, "Everything is ok. Everything is in fact getting better."
I was picking the dead leaves off of Shelley, my plant. Yes, I'm weird, I named my office plant.
Anyway, I was tugging on one particularly stubborn dead leaf and the whole plant came out of the pot. She had roots, but they were fragile and weren't planted deep enough.
I'm so sorry for doing that to her...I was just trying to clear away the dead leaves. But she still has some roots. So, I've replanted her deeper into the soil, with the soil bunched up around her to give her some support. And I watered her.
She's not a flowering plant, but I hope someday she'll 'bloom' again.
It occured to me that my situation is similar to what just happened with Shelley.
My roots weren't deep enough and were too fragile. However, I've replanted myself and surrounded myself with support.
I think my best solution will be to harness this 'energy' and use it to help me get into the shape that I want to be in. So that WHEN the point comes that he's able to make a move on me...I'll feel comfortable enough in my body to focus on the moves he's making. Rather than worrying and being embarrassed about my body.
But hopefully, after 7 + months, he'll be looking through rose colored glasses anyway.
In my search for finding ways to turn challenges into positives, I think I've found a good solution for this one.
Hey, I'm going to have to find some constructive channel for all this pent up 'energy'.
One that strikes a chord in many of us I think...
