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#744695 06/23/06 04:56 PM
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Hi GH and all, One of the first books that I read, which was very helpful to me, was:

When a Mate Wants Out, by Jim and Sally Conway

This book is written from a Christian perspective, so some readers might not like that. However, I found the focus on what there was for me to do, and in particular, the spiritual/inner work, to be powerful and helpful. The book is easy to read, and I have referred to it again and again. Particularly when I am feeling angry, it is a good remedy.


PositivelyListening
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When one door of happiness closes, another one opens; but often we look so long at the closed door that we do not see the one which has been opened for us. - Helen Keller
#744696 06/23/06 05:39 PM
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Thank you PL. I guess I will get the Bible out of the way now that you are mentioning the Christian angle. The benefits of reading this are probably pretty obvious to most Christians.

Another book I have read, or should I say, listened to (I mostly do audiobooks on my iPod), is...

The Little Book of Letting Go

I admittedly didn't finish this one but what I did read was pretty good. It's all about how to let go of the things that cause us anxiety on a daily basis. It's a real hands on kind of book with a lot of exercises that you do as you read. I read this at the right time in my sitch because it's simple approach to a complex problem really helped me learn to detach and approach my sitch from a different perspective.

GH


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#744697 06/26/06 12:00 PM
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The Power of Now

Another one I didn't finish...yet. This VERY esoteric and has a "new-age" feel to it despite having plenty of references to mainstream religious scriptures. The author claims that his techniques and ideas will enhance whatever spirituality you currently practice, and I would say that's true. It's all about living in the "now" and once again, letting go of that which we cannot control. Pretty heavy stuff, but also potentially life-altering depending on your perspective and how much his message resonates with you.

I found this book when looking for information on meditation so that should give you some idea of what kinds of things it addresses.

GH


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#744698 06/26/06 12:22 PM
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Okay, I admit that this one may be a little off subject, but I found that The Tao of Pooh was very useful in helping me achieve balance and a certain sense of detachment. Its a great little book that doesn't require a whole lot of thinking.....


"Achieve success, but without vanity; Achieve success, but without aggression; Achieve success, but without gain; Achieve success, but without force." Lao Tzu
#744699 06/26/06 01:01 PM
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Funny you mention that one. I had a GF in college that was BIG into Pooh and I found this book one day while looking for more stuff to get her. I bought it for her but ended up being the one who read most of it. Pretty good stuff, especially in terms of understanding Tao.

GH


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#744700 06/26/06 04:52 PM
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Quote:

Pretty good stuff, especially in terms of understanding Tao.





Agreed, probably one of the easiest reads out there in terms of understanding Tao, altough I wouldn't recommend his follow-up the Te of Piglet. I found it to be a bit too preachy.


"Achieve success, but without vanity; Achieve success, but without aggression; Achieve success, but without gain; Achieve success, but without force." Lao Tzu
#744701 06/26/06 05:24 PM
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All good recommendations, saw one or two early on I can check out...read a lot of the others. Since we are talking books that are more spiritual and self help, I'll stick with that theme. Anything my Thich Nhat Hahn, starting with Teachings on love Now I'm going to blow the one book quota and add The heart of understanding, and peace is every step. sorry.

"He examines Buddhism's 4 basic qualities of authentic love - kindness, compassion, joy, and freedom"

Thich Nhat Hanh


Proverbs 3:5 Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding
#744702 06/26/06 07:34 PM
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my counselor recommended After the Affair. it is great at showing the physical changes that go through a person who has a cheating partner. The phsycology behind the hurt is also helpful. The chapters that follow and describe what to do next and what not to do next are worth reading. It is helpful to read other people's stories that are so similar. what a terrible tragedy this whole affair business is.

#744703 06/26/06 09:05 PM
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Well, (X)W and I (separately) attended a conference last fall given by Emerson Eggeriches about his book LOVE AND RESPECT... Excellent conference good book... and he has a web site by the same name....


I also saw a book at the library a few years ago, thumbed through it and recommended it to a female friend that was having guy troubles.... When Your Love is Liar... don't know who the author is.

Good thread idea BTW GH!!!

I'm having an amusing week. XW has stated that she can't afford living on her own and is having to dip into the proceeds of the sale of a rental property .... Hmmmm. And she was griping about how "tight" I was w/ $$$ a while back and didn't want to go out to dinner etc etc etc. Well, Miss I Want To Be Independent and Love a Virgin Boy... can't pay her CS even though she's got to be making about $65K... But she can get a new puppy and pay for the vet bills.
And when I ran our finances we were a family of 4, had four cars and associated expenses and were socking away $$$ for retirement.
Hmmmm. Instering as a friend says...


Hellbent...
#744704 06/26/06 09:53 PM
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S/B WHEN YOUR LOVER IS A LIAR!!!


Hellbent...
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