Tension seems to have been building between myself and a couple busiess partners. There are some outside influences doing this and my lack of being around to stop it in it's tracks has contributed.
Yesterday I was angry at the situation and decided to make the drive to go clear the air with them.. Now as is my nature I get worked up and very angry at a situation and if I let a little time pass by I get very sensible about it and deal with it in a very sensible and productive way.
So my wife sent me off to "Beat them all". she even wrote me a note of things to do and on the note was "beat them all". Anyone who is new to my thread might not know that the business I am in is a very aggressive form of Kung Fu and I'm the top dog. But I'm a very mello nice guy.
So I went of and handled the situation very well. Things turned out well.
So when I got home my wife had tried to cook dinner (I do the cooking) and turned a 15 lb turkey into a 3 lb chicken. Funny. She had obviously had a couple glasses of wine. She was extremely interested in how badly I had beaten them into submission and wanted stories of me inflicting pain on them. She even told me to lie to her if I hadn't beaten them and just tell her I did.
She then recounted stories of how she had dealt with the bad people in her day and how productive she was. She had dealt with some of them harshly and told me the stories over and over and over. And I actively listened over and over and over. Although she was very unnaffectionate to me when I first got there she seemed to warm up as I listened.
She told me about a conversation with her dad. Her dad had been by before and asked why I seemed upset on my way out. She explained it like so.
"Xue is the alpha dog but he's a really nice guy. He has to go up and knock all the other dogs around. Smash some skulls together. He can do that but he hates it. He's going to learn the hard way that nice guys finish last"
This was repeated several times.
Now What I see is that see loves and admires the way I reasonably and creatively handle situations but fantasizes about me just going in and plain kickin some booty.
One thing that I have decided for sure is that I will be who I want to be and not who she wants me to be, whatever that is.
how strange - she obviously thinks you are here knight in shining armour - this makes a lot of sense as to why things did not go well when the eggshells where on the ground doesn't it
nice finish last is a bit of a myth nice guys are usually the only ones there at the end with all their family and friends still cheering them on but its kind of that fine line between nice guy and bad boy that females like isn't - remember ages ago that thread we all posted on about this
I love the way she cooks sounds like me I truly think that she is really a tough lady who wants to be thought of as tough but who on the inside wants to be a princess with her knight in shining armour always close by
I have a very strong, incredibly intelligient friend who is doing a phd it is full of these mathematical calculations that not many people in the world understand and it gets checked by this famous stats dude in Oxford London and she is without a doubt a strong lady but is looking for a male who is as intelligient as her and (her words) forceful??????
you sound like all is good - you will most definately be there at the end with everyone cheering you on
Quote: how strange - she obviously thinks you are here knight in shining armour - this makes a lot of sense as to why things did not go well when the eggshells where on the ground doesn't it
A lot more sense now that you mention it. I started being a bit more "forceful" the other day. It was on the phone and I think it was a shock to her, but I think the end result was great.
Quote: - remember ages ago that thread we all posted on about this
I live by that old thread
Quote: I love the way she cooks sounds like me
I love the way she laughs about the way she cooks rather than feel all insecure about it. This is a big change. She told several people the 14lb tukey to 3 lb chicken joke. It's a funny story the way she tells it.
Quote: I truly think that she is really a tough lady who wants to be thought of as tough but who on the inside wants to be a princess with her knight in shining armour always close by
I'm good with that. And it sure seems to be the case doesn't it?
Your friend is the type of woman I thought I wanted way back when. I was a Physics major and according to my professors I was a bit of a prodigy. But life gave me someone very different than what I thought I wanted and the reasons are coming clear.
Thank you for checking in on me BJ. It's so nice.
I noticed the last day or so something is different. I think it is that she is paying more attention to me. Always complimenting me and always aware. She is very loving these past couple days, not physically but in her words and actions.
Coincidence that it is immediatly after I "forcefully" handled some situations that could have gone really badly. I played "alpha male" and she was the one to use the term.
Unfortunately we have a very busy weekend out at the fair and springtime has got her allergies in full swing. That's put a damper on things but I wonder how they would be if we could take some time to ourselves this weekend.
She has a birthday coming this week and I've been struggling over what to get her.
Remember the makeup. Well she's all of a sudden more interested in girly things. I took her shopping for clothes last week and she bought stuff that is way out of the norm for her. She's always said she wore all black because she never knew how to color coordinate. She's been wearing colors she would have never worn in the past and looks great.
So today she wants this hat she found. Again, totally out of the norm for her. She says " I don't know what's up with me, must be going through some MLC or something." She's finding it strange herself.
Tommorrow I'm going to go try to figure which hat it was and get it for her.
I think I'll actually get her something girlie for her birthday.
absolutely you need to find something girlie what about a day at one of those places that do manicures and massages and facemasks?!!
or getting glamour photo's done they are great fun you could do them together and have one framed
I am sure there are lots of 'girlie' type things you could think of
She may not understand it but people change - we change all the time and don't usually realise it
the other thing is quite a few times lately 'strange' females have been nice towards you - smiling and stuff she notices it just may be that you have that fine line between nice boy bad boy happening combined with you 'trying to do things on your own' every now and again must make you interesting and she wants to be around you
what ever it is you are doing you are doing good and I think it is brilliant
Yes finding something girlie should be easy. As a matter of fact it makes things much easier. It's been tough finding her something appropriate in the past.
Yes there have been a lot of women taking notice lately. I hear it as I leave the lobby sometimes. Little "wow, he looks great" comments to my wife. They are always just as I am getting out of earshot, like I can't hear it. It's kinda cool because every time my wife has to say something like "yes he sure does doesn't he, he's been working out a lot."
Twice yesterday women were screaming at me from their cars. When I was washing the truck a car loads of them stopped in front screaming cat calls. They drove away and then backed up and did it again. They were shouting "Hey I like your hose". Pretty funny. I hope my wife heard it. She probably did.
In the beginning it was the beard. So many women commented about the beard. But my body has changed a lot too. My wife doesn't like the beard. It's getting hot and I think it's about time to shave it off. I somehow doubt that the catcalls will stop when I do. At least I hope not. I did have a lot of comments that it gave me a bad boy look. I know for a fact that my wife doesn't like it though. Very strange, so many women find it very attractive but not my wife. She hates it, but she won't say so out right.
Another thing I've noticed is she has stopped saying "you can do whatever you want". this was something she picked up from her C and she started saying it all the time. It made me furious, but I didn't show it. It was the most ridiculous comment to me.
I guess you are right. I am doing very well. I look at all these threads where when the reconciliation starts, the sex starts. But not mine. But I wonder if it isn't better that way. Things go a little longer, get a little more fixed. Not that I want to wait any longer. I'm going crazy. And all these women hitting on me isn't making it easier. But what's making it really hard is being so close to my wife and not being able to touch her. When we were distant that was easier. Now that we are very close it is ssoooooooo hard.
I was shocked at your prediction back in Jan that I would get her in the sack in the first half of this year. I was like "what? six months, your crazy!!!". But here we are upon it and I think you may have been right.
How about getting a spa day for the two of you for her birthday, and then a romantic dinner. I think having massages together is very relaxing, and can lead to more sensual activities - worth a try, anyway.
BTW, I love a beard on a man, but my H hates it. Sometimes, he will grow one just to please me though.
Me:57 H:52 M:28 Got another lawyer last year and filed. D35,S/D twins28,D22 EA4/04 End? Who knows? "Life is like a mirror. Smile at it and it smiles back at you." — Peace Pilgrim
