Well, She invited me over for drinks this weekend.
Right move would have been "sorry I have plans but would love to some other time."
Originally Posted by Mach40
She apologized about not keeping contact with me. as she said her past two weeks with work have been extremely crappy.
Ah yeah it's tough to take 2 minutes to respond. You have a flip flopper which is fun (insert eyeroll). Make Saturday count.
Right move for you, maybe.. For me, I am going over and trying to have a good time..YOLO. Response time? Bit harsh, but I get where you are coming from.
Sometimes I really question whether you understand my posts lol.
I do, In person things would be easier, I am sure. Maybe one day we can all get together.. I will be in Pensacola, Florida, for 6 weeks starting next week
You texted this woman who you have been casually seeing for I don't know months? She can't text you back for days and you are going to run right over there.
You are always asking for advice.
Why are you making her a priority when you are not a priority of hers?
You texted this woman who you have been casually seeing for I don't know months? She can't text you back for days and you are going to run right over there.
You are always asking for advice.
Why are you making her a priority when you are not a priority of hers?
I met her casually via walking the dogs, and have been over to her house for New Years and one other night after that.. Rest of the time has been via walking dogs, talking, you know discovery of each other.. Should I have expected her to double down and have sex with me the following week after NYE, and dinner? She was sick too, but I know that means nothing due to your job not having issue with sick people, but mine and hers are critical to being healthy. But, you roll your eyes to that like its a nothing burger. Whatever.. Look, I ask for advice because I am asking. Is that bad. Its advice, simple. Some of it is harsh and from experience, and some, well, I need to see if it works for me.. And I appreciate it. The real issue is meeting people you enjoy being around. The more I experience that after being holed for a few years, the better. If I shut down every opportunity, then I shut down a possibility. She and I will probably never amount to more than what it is. I dont care. I leave Tuesday, will be back for a couple months. She may be with another man. Its called life, and I will deal with it, with advice from people here and elsewhere. I am at least getting my feet wet.
I met her casually via walking the dogs, and have been over to her house for New Years and one other night after that.. Rest of the time has been via walking dogs, talking, you know discovery of each other..
I'm getting confused here. For one you kinda seem to be all over the place - not just with this woman but in general. But specifically to this woman, I get it can be hard to remember every specific detail, but you just claimed you've only been out twice. I thought, "that's odd, I thought for sure you've been with her, including at her house, more than twice." And why would I think that, well, because it's what you've posted here yourself.
Originally Posted by Mach40 on January 9
Yes, we had a date Saturday. [January 7] Simple dinner, had a good time. Tonight. [January 9] I went to her house, killed two bottles of wine. Lots of discovery.
So that's three dates right there - and that was a month ago! Then on January 11, just a few days after this third time together, you stated:
Originally Posted by Mach40
So is there a poll going as to when I will do something with this lady? When she or I initiate anything, well, that's when it will happen. But, I am pretty sure this weekend will be good, as we are doing dinner at her house, and an old movie.
In that post you were referring to either the 4th meeting or the 3rd date (depending on how these things are being termed. That's when LH Asked:
Originally Posted by LH19 posted on January 15
How did last night go? Did you steal a smooch?
To which you answered "Yes I did.. We had some Port wine , probably helped. Tonight, dinner at her place with friends.."
We later learned the kiss was a peck on the cheek as you were leaving. However, that's at least 4 dates, plus the dinner with friends that ended up being just a dinner for 2 because the friends had to back out. I'd call that date number 5. But wait, there's more...
Originally Posted by Mach40 on January 27
Lady and I are doing well.. Going to nice steak house tomorrow, Halls Chop house..
By my count, based on your posts, that would be at least date number 6. Or am I missing something? So why would you be saying the quote posted at the very top claiming met on NYE and only one night after that? In an effort not to make this interrogation even longer, you did post nearly two weeks ago that you felt her pulling away and that you were "going to back off and see how she responds."
All I'm saying is something is not adding up. Maybe you feel the same and are trying to down play it all to avoid scrutiny, but 6 "dates" without a kiss is landing you firmly in the friend zone. That may be why she has pulled back and could well be thinking "I don't think he's into me. We've gone out a half dozen times and he's not even tried to kiss me." Women looking to date will say this exact line to their friends. Women looking for a buddy will not. If you do give this another shot, it may be your last chance to show her you are interested in more than a platonic buddy.
But my main goal in all of this, and with most of my posts, is to deal in reality. You may be gearing up for date #7, not #2 or #3. That's just seems to be the truth of the situation based on your own posts. No, you still do not have to be having sex with her but by this point most all women would expect at least a real kiss.
I say all of this to try to help you.
DonH Midwest Me 56 WAW-EXW 55 Met 11/95 / Married 5/00 Bomb 6/20/05 / She Filed on 6/2/06 / Divorced on 10/9/06 4 who'd qualify as GF since D & dated about 25 women since D
NYE isn't a date is it? I am thinking dates are nights with her alone, not with other company. So, this should be technically 4th time. And she contacted me to go over this weekend, Sat. Does that make more sense? So we shall see if I am a friend or more. I am all over the place, and I need to focus more. I do believe I will put into friend category. Just a gut. This was/is my first dip in the dating seriously pool in quite some time.. If none of my posts are jiving, we can disregard them.. Not to be Mr Negative, but I am/have been dealing some issues in life, its not an excuse, but it is what it is.
Don did a nice job of laying it out Mach and we are just trying to help. For future reference don’t do group dates until your a couple because I think it makes things even more confusing for you.
Think you might have screwed the pooch on this one but see where you stand Saturday because quite frankly you have nothing to lose at this point.
Thnx to both of you. Yeah, I think I fornicated the canine for sure. Just feeling it.. Gut instincts before and during separation were spot on.. Just didnt know how to move forward. After reading the book , 3%, for example. I am made mistakes. Not sure if they are 100% percent correct, but, I will have learned.. I have to start moving forward more positively. Learn from mistakes and dont do it again..
