Oz, CW is right. You need to be less available to her. Ideally you will have so many GAL activities planned that your answer can be, “sorry I’ve already made plans”. The problem I saw with that conversation was that you were basically asking her what she wanted to do. Like CW said it shouldn’t have been a question to her about what she wanted to do, but if you wanted to or not. I know you’ve said GAL is tough for you, so make it a goal to spend at least a couple hours a day getting out and GAL if you don’t need to care for S.
Guys I hope someone is on. Like in a bad way. I don’t think I can do this. She spent most of her time at the pool on her phone. Tapping away
Everything good from yesterday gone
This evening she looks at me with disgust. And hate. And I think I’m done. I can’t take this pain. I think I’m just gonna tell her if she wants a divorce fine. I hope she’s happy with whatever dude she’s found. He can have her.
I’m setting here falling apart and she could give 2 shits. I could not and would not ever treat her this way.
I think I just need to rip the bandaid off and she can see how it feels to be slapped in the face I don’t share my wife.
This is more than me. I’m not good at DBing. It isn’t me.
I can’t do it right. She is gonna ask her why I didn’t call when I got home I I don’t know what to say. She knows I was just setting there having a beer
Hi Ozman, I'm here. Short: Do not make hasty decision. Do not make emotional comments. Go for a long walk. Make this decision in a couple days when you're head is clear. I think you know this.
I'll try to answer longer, but I also need to eat before my date arrives!
Hey Oz, we’ve all been there man it’s not easy. Just remember you are still on the roller coaster until you detach more. You are having a shtty day today, tomorrow can be better.
Is an EA or PA a deal breaker for you?
I think you need to cool off and think things through. Never say or do anything while you are feeling emotional. Give it some time and cool off. You need to be certain you want to D, but don’t make that decision in the heat of the moment. Do you have any proof or suspicions of an A?
She is gonna ask her why I didn’t call when I got home I I don’t know what to say.
It's hard to find calm action when your world's a hurricane. If you promised to call, "Sorry, I was enjoying a beer and lost track of time." If you didn't promise to call, "Oh, I was just enjoying a beer. Have fun?"
Everything good is only gone, as long as you base "goodness" 100% on your wife's actions. As soon as you detach even a little--say, go swimming 33% to be with your wife, 33% to be with your child, and 33% because you enjoy swimming--how she behaves will have much less power over you. You will be able to have a good day even when she's having a bad day. I am sorry you're having a tough night. ::hugs::
It really is like she is possessed. She’s like trying to murder me with her eyes. Disgust contempt. We set down to eat. Boom. Super chatty. Telling me stories about her day. I have a question about her story she gets all snappy and mean
Then boom actually making me laugh. WTF is going on?!?!
She settled down like everybody said. We’ve had like 2 good weeks in a row. What happened? I thought she put us in a holding pattern. Maybe we still are?
I actually don’t know if an A is a deal breaker for me. It’s too painful to think about. Part of me thinks I could never move past it. Part of me thinks I could. I’m guess ing this is why I shouldn’t confront her about it yet
