I'm like everyone else, you hope it turns on them soon. But for LBSs its not soon enough. Its like how much more can a person take? I don't know. It's the neverending rollercoaster isn't it. I'm just going to enjoy my kids every minute I have them. She'll regret all of this someday.
Here is the gist of your problems. You are focusing on your W and OM. Which is bad, as you can clearly see. Your energy goes to waste as you hope beyond hope to break them up. It is not uncommon for a WW to move on to OM2 if OM1 falls through. What then? You will just get crushed again. So best stop it. And stop it right now. Your focus is totally off yourself and your kids.
FOCUS DUDE!!!
Your W will do what she will do and there is not one GD thing you can do to change it. What have you done for yourself lately? What are your GALs?
Unfortunately L, that about sums it up. There is nothing you can do, but let her go and focus on you and the kids. Your sitch is somewhat similar to mine, and i had to go through 5 days knowing W was on a cruise with OM that she lied to me about.
The sooner you can let her go the better for you. I didnt find this out until i had suffered for a long time, and didnt find this forum until my sitch was well over a year old.
Together:20 years M:3 years Me:40 WW:40 S15 A suspected:5/17 AC:5/18 BD:8/18 WW in full blown R w/ OM Still under same roof
L - Last week my XW Facetimed my daughters from her BF house. 1.5 years in and it still stings. I know it all really [censored] but you have to start to get out and do things for yourself. You need to start lifting weights, nothing feels better than walking out of the gym with an incredible pump. It is also a great way to channel your anger and it also increases your endorphins which really helps fight depression. This morning I struggled to get out of bed but the mental picture of my XW and the memories of what she did was all I needed to make it happen.
At some point in time you have to pick yourself up off the ground and start moving forward.
Hang in there.
Last edited by Cadet; 09/12/1802:33 PM. Reason: Start a new thread message
Well..just quick update. My little daughter facetimed my W while she's on her way home. I didn't realize it until I heard her voice. I could feel my blood go chill instantly. I was trying to take my mind off of everything. I was doing so much better a couple weeks ago and for some reason I've fallen back into a gloom. I know the trip shes on has really twisted me up big time. I dwelled on it way to much, kept waking up at 2 am. I need to stop and get myself back together immediately. I usually work long hours 7 to 5...pretty exhausted when I get home, however I'm going to fit some sort of work out in. I've been spending time reading with the s6 and keeping up on laundry, lunches etc. The W gets kids back tomorrow. I'm so used to having them, I'm going to miss them. I'm trying so hard to channel my mind elsewhere, my feelings have once again been destroyed after I thought I was making progress. I still think I'm making progress, it's just my own assumption. I guess I need to start climbing again. I'm proud that I still dont reach out to her and giving her 100% freedom to experience her fake happiness. I know I'm down but not out ...I will get back at it again starting now.
ME 47 W 38 M17 T20 Separated 5/20/18 D-bomb 7/9/2018 Nothing Filed 4 kids ages 6, 10, 14, 15
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Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
