Thanks for your opinions, they give me another prespective, which is good.
Still the same here, the W is still doing things through the kids. Most recent event was Tuesday, when i picked D13 up from W house. As we are walking to the car D13 said mum picked up from school because she was unwell, then says her and mum had been speaking and my daughter now wants us to have a week at a time, but my son would remain on a different schedule. I was a bit emotional with my daughter, but i said i respected her wishes. I still have to pick her up from her mums to take her to school at 8am, her mother leaves for work at 5.30am.
D13 says she is unwell on Wednesday, so i take the day off and stay with her. Throughout the day she seems ok, so i tell her that she if deffenetly going to school the next day. In the morning i get all tears and i ask her what is wrong, she says she is unwell, i exp.ain that she needs to go to school and i take her. We sit at the school carpark for a few minutes and then she goes of her own accord, i watch her walk in with one of her friends, then proceed to work.
I have a busy day, i have a presentation to make in the city and i had made W aware of this 2 weeks prior as i was having trouble picking the kids up. I told W, i would get one of our friends to pick them up and would get them from the friends house once i had finished.
Two hours later i get a call from W, that she has gone to pick D13 up from school and is taking her to work with her and will let her stay in the staff canteen. I say ill come and get her off you and take her back to mine where can stay until i come home. W says that i dont think she is of stable mind to be alone, my response was that i didnt thiunk it would be good for her to be in a strange environment surrounded by strangers. So i ask to speak to D13, i asked her what she wanted to do. She said to go to mums work. I was ok with that. Then W comes back on the phone and has a go at me about sons school work, which he left at school. Then says why is friend picking S10 up, i am his mother i should have been given the task to do. Holy cow. It didnt affect me that much as this site has helped to navigate these thing. D13 then texts me at 2pm and tell me she is at mums house, W dropped her off and went back to work.
Then lastnight, D13 says mum would like the mop and bucket. I say ok and get it ready for her in the morning. She drops S10 off at 7am, i give her the mop and bucket. She asks how the dog is at my place. I say shes good, we go out for walks twice a day. She asks me do i think she is better here, i say i dont know. W then says do you think she would be better with you full time, i say no as she is the family pet. I asked, dont you want her, she said yes, her sudgesting me having the dog is breaking her heart, she is quite teary while saying this. Then she goes and pushes my buttons and how hard it is for her, struggling to put fuel in the car and its all my fault. My response was that i never made any descisions i just allowed you to make all you descisions. I said the only one i did was that i said to the kids that this was a mutual decision at the start and i have taken a lot of the blame from my kids over this, which is not true. Other things were said, i tried to leave and close the door, we she responded by telling me that this was still 50% of hers and cant do that. I didnt say anything to that.
Then W proceeds to say tha her dad said she should have stayed in the house and fought for full custody of the kids. I have a good relationship with her parents. I said thanks, your perseption of your parents has now affected my emotional connection to them and walked away and shut the door. I shouldnt have said that.
It hasnt really affected me that much, so im still in a good place.
Hi scoobs, what you said near the end of your post worries me a little. Bear in mind my ex tried to get full custody and move off w/om, but if she said it she’s thought it and I would keep my guard up.
