Leaving it up to God (I think!)

[Coly23]

Hi All! Just seen updates this week from my two good friends on this board Andrew P and Altair so thought I should post an update too. Hugs to you both.

I've been doing okay. Had a rough time at Easter but since I've back to work I feel a bit better. I think I need the routine of work because when I am in holiday that is when it all goes down hill for me. Especially when it is a holiday at home just pottering.

I had a great night out last Thursday at our work's award ceremony. We actually stayed up in the hotel bar until 4.00am! The only other time I was awake at that ungodly hour was when I was in labour for D! Well anyway the next couple of days was rubbish. I really missed coming home and talking to H about the night and also there were a few men hitting on me as soon as they found out we were seperated which I really didn't lik. I know at some stage in the future I may have to look at getting back into the dating game again but I don't like that idea. I know I don't have to think about it now but it's always in the back of my mind. Blegh.

On the H front. It's been six weeks since I last saw him and Easter Sunday was the last time he texted myself and D. We are just leaving him alone but I still think about him every minute of the day and still miss him terribly. It will be a year next month since he left and it feels like only yesterday. I wonder if he will ever reach out to me because it feels like he has moved on. I think it was Roist who said that when we go NC/dark we shouldn't expect them to panic and make contact with us straight away because there will be a period of time where the WS will mirror you and go dark to. I guess this is what caused me to panic the last time and reach out to him after seven weeks. I need to let him have his thoughts and feelings and hopefully miss me and D.

Anyway in other news. I managed to book a holiday for myself and D in July. We are taking her friend with us so at least she can have some companionship her own age. Something to look forward to.

I've also starred redecorating my hallway although my poor Dad had a job disconnecting the radiator off the wall as the valve was broken and wasn't shutting off the water! also my dishwasher stopped working when he was here which was a blessing because he was able to fix it for me. I've always been a practical person but now I'm on my own I'm taking more notice of what my Dad does so I can do more for myself.

Anyway thanks for visiting. I still read along everyday and try to post on all your threads although sometimes I just don't have any wise words but that doesn't mean you are not in my thoughts.

Happy Sunday everyone!