Unfortunately, it's easy for them to get us if they try. That's why there's no good that can come from these discussions or arguments. All it does is cause pain in us and they walk away thinking were the bad guy.
Hi, I'm am sorry that you are experiencing this. As a matter of fact I am sorry that anyone here is. I am in no position to give advice, but I do want to be able to uplift by sharing with you and everyone here.
Today I was driving to work and I was listening to one of my AM Stations.
Have you ever felt when going through rough times that God is speaking to you? It happens to me a lot when in troubled times.
Well, today listening to the radio station, a woman being interviewed was speaking on her breakthrough. The Pastor asked her:
"Do you believe that "God" took that dead man out of the ground and raised him to life so that he can save you?"
"You think God can take a dead man raise him to life again to save you, but you don't think God can save your marriage?"
Everything is possible if God is in it!
JudyL, If you can't love yourself how can you love somebody else?
It will be okay. A good lesson in STFU and not allowing him to bait you into a fight. It takes some time, but You will start to notice the signs of when he is baiting you for a fight. There is still hope. As Azzork said, it's only one incident. But you must not fight with him. It will give him more justification for his terrible actions and why he is asking for a divorce. Do NOT give that to him.
Next time he baits you, walk out of the room and take a walk.
He's already filed for D. I told him tonight I was not lifting one finger to help him. If he wants to D, he will go through my lawyer. He's madder than a hornet right now.
I tipped my hand during the argument, darn it. All the incriminating evidence has been taken off Facebook before I had the chance to hit print screen!
Will it make a difference, do you think?
He tipped his hand too, by telling you he had filed. I for one am glad you stood your ground, maybe not in quite the full on way you did, but hey I will encourage what I see that's positive for you.
I am not negative about a screaming banshee experience, for me there was enormous growth in it. In learning to manage that aspect of my behaviour and atoning.Your screaming banshee is protecting you, learn from it.
You know that it makes a difference, to stick up for yourself? So does he now, good for you.
It's further shift , to be angry and fight back. Use that anger to move forwards.
Yes, it makes a difference. Has the skank (she now has a name) taken down her FB stuff? And he won't be in charge of other posters, go seek out evidence if you can find some. Especially if you can get hold of his phone bills and/or emails. You are looking for Intel. I have witness statements too.
Did you record your discussion/disagreement?
V
Last edited by Vanilla; 09/26/1506:10 AM.
Freedom is just another word for nothing left to loose. V 64, WAW
Vanilla-He caught me by surprise. I did not record the argument. I think this will be the last time he is able to manipulate me, though. I caught on towards the end and called him on it.
Skank has disabled her Facebook, too. I don't think they realize that disabling both accounts at the same time is incriminating as heck. I believe the biggest thing I have is the forwarded e-mails, which my attorney already has. If it gets nasty, I think a computer forensics person can pull all that stuff back out anyways.
During the text war, I made a statement. I said do you really think it didn't occur to me to hit print screen? Totally bluffing, but H doesn't know that. It took him a bit, but he finally caught on.
I would have thought since he was throwing me away, it would not matter one way or the other if he lost control of me...you were right, I was mistaken. Turns out my sudden show of spine is ruining his life. I had a talk with my sons tonight...unpleasant, but necessary. They won't be leaving me alone in the house anymore with him.
He threatened to throw my (ahem) out in the street. I laughed in his face and said attorney will answer with a restraining order, go ahead. He really, really wanted to harm me, I could see it. I told him he could have been great, too bad...
I changed all my passwords on everything I could think of, including the bank. That's going to drive him insane. I didn't tell him I have an appt with L on Tuesday, thank goodness. I'm saving that for a nasty surprise of my own.
I prayed for a long time tonight. I gave H over to God. I realize I cannot help him. He is lost and broken right now. I'm on a new path. No more fighting...just walking away. Maybe he will come around, maybe not.
I'm sure there will be more yet to come. I'm already tired of it all. God willing, I will keep my cool from now on.
