Just Fishin'

[mahhhty]

Thanks You All for the support!!!!! X came over Thursday night and the party is today. I'll follow up tonight or tomorrow.

[mahhhty]

It was really nice signing in quickly yesterday to see the outpouring of support. I'd like to thank everyone again.

It's been a busy couple of days, here is a quick recap.

Thursday was my S's birthday. I took him and his sister to a Children's Museum. It was great. We had a wonderful time. I was a little nervous going into the city with two younglings but we had a blast! Thursday night X came over, and brought dinner. We opened presents, had dinner then had cake. That was the first time we spent significant time together in roughly 6 or 7 months. Parts were slightly awkward, others were fine and some were fun. My S had a really hard time with her leaving, and my D asked repeatedly why she wasn't staying. They still associate her home as our home. Here.

Friday she picked up the kids. During the pickup I saw a CT newspaper with the sports section pulled out and on top. She works in CT, but is not a sports buff. Obviously, there could be many reasons for the paper. But my mind goes towards the idea of an OM. But that doesn't matter.

Saturday was the party here. It went very well. I felt as if she stayed in her comfort zone, which is understandable (stayed closed to her family). Her family approached me at different times to say how it was great that we were all together. There was definitely an interesting dynamic. I had a long talk with my older sister after the party and she said that if anyone didn't know they would think it was just another party at our house, and she said that I seemed really happy. So from my perspective mission accomplished. I think I accomplished exactly what I was supposed to.

Today I spent the day picking up and recouping. Then at 9 PM I get this text from her "Sorry for the last minute notice, but I finally secured my dad, BIL and BIL's friend's trailer to get the washer, dryer, and treadmill. Can they come by tomorrow evening for those? Sorry, they have been dodging me for months on this."

I thought about many different responses, how it was rude and disrespectful to ask for such a request the night before, less than 24 hours. But then I realized it does not matter. So I responded with "No. I will not be home." Simple and to the point. She has not written back. Nor do I expect her too. She didn't get her way.

I was thinking about me during this process. I lost three close relatives/family friends, got divorced, started a business, gained a lot of emotional intelligence, new found thirst for life, etc etc etc. During this she has not once asked me a question about me. How are you? or anything close. I think that is sad, but it is only fuel to help me detach and create a business relationship with her.

[Bob723]

I was thinking about me during this process. I lost three close relatives/family friends, got divorced, started a business, gained a lot of emotional intelligence, new found thirst for life, etc etc etc. During this she has not once asked me a question about me. How are you? or anything close. I think that is sad, but it is only fuel to help me detach and create a business relationship with her.

Hello Mahhhty,

Wow...you sure were busy, weren't you? Whew.

Your quote above almost makes me want to cry because we all love you so much--you are such a caring guy! I can't count the number of times you have helped me and others. For your XW to not ask even once how you are doing is so cold.

I love the way you turned it into a positive: "but it is only fuel to help me detach" Good for you!

Don't ever stop being you. Something good is going to happen for you soon. I just have this feeling.

You are hanging tough, my friend.

Bob

[mahhhty]

As predicted I never did receive a response in regards to my text response. Similarly, she was very short last night on the phone. Undoubtably upset, that I dismissed her request.

I'm coming up on another almost 9 day stint with the kids. To my knowledge this will be the third time, she has traveled so I get the kids for an extended period of time. I don't mind one bit. As I will always be there for the kids and look forward to our time together.

I'd be lying if I said this past weekend didn't throw me into a little funk. I suppose its from Interacting that much, when there has been a huge lack of interaction recently. This AM, I heard this, "the grass is greener where you water it, not on the other side." Interesting concept that I agree with.

[lost18]

"Sometime the grass will appear greener on the other side because it has been fertilized by bullsh!t!"

Hope your funk passes soon, I know it is difficult to have so much interaction. Enjoy your time with your kiddos!

[teach3]

It's great that you are thinking of yourself during this process because like you said they don't even care to ask how we feel. Keep setting those boundaries to protect your hard work...and keep watering the grass on your side of the fence.

[mahhhty]

teach - She left when the hose was kinked & broken, thinking it could never be repaired. It most certainly can and will be fixed.

lost - I'm fine now. Just a little funk, where I wasn't eating right, exercising or doing anything to make myself feel better. What about you? Are you holding up alright?

Bob - Thanks for swinging by the other day.

[Bob723]

Mahhhty, you're welcome, my friend. Thank you for swinging by my thread, too. You brought a huge smile to my face when you mentioned that I have so many "followers." That was kind of you to say. You do as well.

I can understand how you feel when you wrote this in a recent post:

"I'd be lying if I said this past weekend didn't throw me into a little funk. I suppose its from Interacting that much, when there has been a huge lack of interaction recently."

This happens to me sometimes whem my W sends me a "nice" text, then she follows up with that "nasty" one from last Friday.

Do you feel like you had any expectations? Or did it just feel good, which I could certainly see throwing you, or anyone in your shoes, into a "funk."

Buddy, please hang in there, we don't know what tomorrow will bring! PMA!

Bob

[mahhhty]

Thanks Bob. I don't think I had any expectations, it was just familiar. Familiar to have her here, in the house with the kids, playing, preparing, etc.

As for PMA, I am doing my best. The startups are taking a lot more time, and are sometimes stressful. I was offered a promotion yesterday at my full time job. However, it would require me to be in the office a lot more. I'm not sure, but I think I will turn it down to continue to be in the driver seat of my life.

[Defacto]

Mahhhty,
Congrats on the promotion even if you pass on it. I'm sure it still feels good. Stay positive. Keep focusing on you and the happiness we are all searching for.