Ripken - LRT with a WW and divorce filed #3

[Bob723]

Trying to get used to this change and be ok with the constant feelings coming and going. Ww texted me about something I forgot out the house, but it's not important, so I won't respond. Going to be hard to interact with her as she'll be dropping boys off at 530 or so in the morning and never coming up. She may even pick them up on her days to minimize that. We'll have to see where this goes, but I can use help on how to maximize the limited interactions we will have. Suggestions are definitely appreciated.

"The Phoenix must burn to emerge." I feel reborn.

Hey Ripken,

What an emotional day it must have been for you, but it sounds like you handled it very well. Well done, my man! Honestly, the emotional roller coaster will probably get bumpier before it starts to smooth out. I love your Phoenix quote, that's the spirit! Rip Version 2.0.

As for how to maximize the limited interactions you will have, this may seems obvious but try to keep them short and end them gracefully. Try to stick to the subject and no talk about reconiliation or your feelings.

Another thing I thought of, is to do what I do. If I get a text or VM from my W, and I'm not sure how to reply, I post on the forum and someone will always step up (you have!)and help me. Just today, I got advice from several people, and Wonka stepped up big time. She wrote to me today that this is second nature to her.

Patience, my friend. I am really proud of how far you have come.

Bob

[Ripken8]

Thanks, bob. You've come a long way, too. I tried not to put too much thought or worry into going dark or what limited interaction would look like or if ww would view going dark as me not caring, because I wasn't moved out yet. Now that I am, I'm sure that will start to sink in more and I'll be left with a lot of questions.

But I. Sure you, wonka, Sandi, heavy, Matt, de facto, Kramer and everyone else on this board will continue to be there with support and advice. No way I'd come this far without all of you!

[Bob723]

Rip, you're so welcome and thank you for the encouraging words!

That's a good way to handle almost anything with DB'ing: don't put too much thought into things such as going dark, etc. That may sound funny coming from me. I'm probably one of the most "guilty" members in our "DB Family" of over-thinking things.

You're a step ahead of me, sir!

Yes, they will all be here. what would we do without them and each other? Such a blessing.

Chin up, I have a feeling you're going to get thru this.

I will dedicate a prayer to you and Mrs. Ripken right after I click on "Submit."



Bob

[Defacto]

Rip,
I'm stoked to hear things are going well with your new place. Keep posting so we can help each other every step of the way. WW will probably give you the "I miss you" speech soon so be ready for it.

[Ripken8]

Thanks bob and de facto. I'm not sure about the I miss you speech. Just a couple days ago, she asked for my help to get more involved in selling the house and is looking at places to move to. The two of us living in separate places with no home to go back to doesn't seem ideal for reconciliation.

[Ripken8]

Starting a new thread

[Wonka]

Rip,

The two of us living in separate places with no home to go back to doesn't seem ideal for reconciliation.

You need to know that the VAST MAJORITY of Success Stories involved physical separation. This works because it allows the WAS to see changes in you and miss the essence of the LBS. On several levels, this is a good thing in my opinion.

Keep going!

[Ripken8]

Wonka - you have no idea how great that makes me feel! I have always questioned that and felt that with DB preaching stay in the same home, I was hurting my chances, even though I felt I needed to do it for me.