The small talk is fine. That can gradually be transitioned into more serious talks later. Just roll with it and have fun. Don't invest too many emotions into it because this could be his way of reaching out and he'll probably retreat afterwards.
No sense in trying to analyze what he's doing when he doesn't even know what he's doing himself.
M-43 W-40 2D - 9 and 5
Emotion, yet peace. Ignorance, yet knowledge. Passion, yet serenity. Chaos, yet harmony. Death, yet a new life.
Thanks for the good advice you are right something is better then nothing and it actually is not painful right now however when I try to guess what is meant by it that is where I run into problems and I think I would be better off by "not investing too many emotions or thoughts on it.
I do its in Infidelity/Extramarital Affairs named To Pursue or Not #2. I haven't mentioned it there, only to my IC which happens to be one of DB's.
So here's a little more detail -WAW has/had EA, I don't know if it was PA -Pretty much been a doormat for WAW and we're S as of Dec 2014 -Since bomb drop, we've been friendly, small talk throughout the day via emails, doing things with kids, etc. but no intimacy or talks on improving situation -On a 3-day trip with the kids in May, I get a hold of her cell phone and she's met this guy at her 2nd job and they text each other alot, and he's been over once but she fell asleep (nothing happened), some of text exchange is sexting; she referred to me as her ex in texts to him -On way back home from trip I confront her about it, she said nothing happened along with how it just felt right, and they don't talk anymore, plus he's in another country now -I decide to go last resort technique and all the friendliness between W and I goes away too
***Note*** Through Facebook snooping this past month I highly suspect she's got an EA going on with one or two OMs and I can only suspect its probably PA.
So what actions should I take to get back that friendliness from her? I thought she was growing warmer towards me despite finding out about OM2. Or should I continue on my last resort technique as well as GAL, etc.
Me:30 W:34 M:8 T:9 D:9 D:4 D:3 S:4 S:1 D bomb: 8/2014 S 12/2014 PA Confirmed in 3/2015 if I recall correctly
No word today from H so I think people were right in telling me not to get too emotionally involved with his small talk that he was doing. I feel if you really care he would continue to contact me.
Saw H this morning when he came to pick up our S. he seemed to have retreated just like you said Mr. Bond. He was not near as friendly or joking like he was for the past week and a half. I wonder what makes them do this. I know stay out of his head and I am going to stay out of his path.
do you think just wait for him to contact me now?
Its so confusing when they do this. I am doing good with the GAL then he is nice and I think okay maybe things are changing around and then nope.
I can't help but wonder why he is nice and then he goes an entire day and no contact it just makes no sense. Maybe he just needs space but sometimes I just want to say hey what about us?
When I do something around the house like get a propane tank for grill he tells me just let me do it. I went ahead and did it myself and he got half mad and said "I told you to let me do it" There are other things that I will have my nephew help me with and he gets mad and says it wasn't done the right way and then in the next breath he says well I don't care its your house. (We both own it though he has moved out)
Which way does he want it? He moved so its my responsibility yet when I do something then he is mad.
ok so therapist said today that she thought he may have had someone else maybe only emotionally though she doesn't seem to really buy into the MLC theories. She seemed to think it is something but not a major event like what we read. I have to disagree with her there but maybe it really was just a good old fashion affair but it sure fits the bill of the MLC threads.
If it was or is an affair I would think he would have filed for divorce by now since this has been going on since the end of last summer all the anger and weirdness and moving out.
I told him 2 weeks ago if he had someone else I would file the papers since it doesn't seem like he wanted to but he said there is no one else. I know that's what they all say and I also know I can't second guess him or what is in his head so I need to GAL. LOL
Today he told me even though we don't live together now he felt the need to tell me that he was going to "bike night" on his new Harley.
I felt that kick in the stomach and wanted to say what a stupid thing to do what are you going for to pick up girls or get attention. I didn't but it really bothered me that he would do that. I know we are separated but he has never been to a "bike night" in his life. He said he was going with a bunch of guys from work.
