So kids came back from J's tonight. I nerd to vent. First time in a long time.
I guess my son and my ex got into it about why S and OW don't get along. My ex asked S if it was because of something I said and S said it has nothing to do with mom. S told him he didnt like OW and he didnt like her kids. My ex asked why and S said he didn't know why he just didn't. J asked him why S would have a problem with their relationship and S said for starters dad you never were honest about being engaged to OW. J told S it was because J didn't want me to know because he was afraid I would go beserk and stalk him and OW because of all the nasty mean things I've done to them despite how much they tried to help me out. Delusional much?
So just a reminder that J is still unhappy. I'm gone and he's still mad. Life isn't what he wanted and it's still my fault. Even though I'm no longer part of his life he still wants me to fix things for him. Lol. Poor delusional fool.
WH
AT BD: WH 41, J 43; Bomb 2/5/2012 Two kids, one dog D Final 6/18/14 J marries OW 1/24/15 "No matter where you go, there you are"
WH I am not so sure that they want to us to fix, as needing someone to blame that the dream isn't working out.
Unless they fix themselves, for some MLCers this need doesn't go away. Others do realise it is them, even if they do nothing about it, but MLCers like ours, not so much!!
Oh geesh! Catching up with you WH and I am glad to see you're doing well. Keep on going and living!
BombOctober 2012- OW 11/28/12 -H still denies Separated 11/29/12 Own place 12/12/12 Confessed OW/EA/PA 2/2/13 Oct 2013 - I knew I was done Jan 2014 - Anticipating the rest of my life
J doesn't want to hear the truth from S on his feelings about him and the OW so XH deflects away...and pointing in your direction as the "reason" why they're keeping mum about the engagement.
How illogical is that??!!
You're doing really great with your new man!! Keep going, baby!
Life isn't what he wanted and it's still my fault.
Are you the least bit surprised, WH?
Your perspective is really great. There will be more times of this illogical nonsense. Some of it is kind of amusing. In a way...
AJ
"Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter" MLK Put the glass down... "Yesterday I was clever so I wanted to change the world Today I am wise, so I am changing myself."
In other news J now is insisting S go to counseling not because of S's relationship with J and OW, but because S appears sullen and withdrawn (as a side note, I don't see this). I talked to S tonight and he doesn't want to go to counseling and that he feels fine about things. I see how when it's self serving to J he is fine with the kids getting help. What a weasel.
This guy has lost his marbles. Things aren't good and he's freaking out.
WH
AT BD: WH 41, J 43; Bomb 2/5/2012 Two kids, one dog D Final 6/18/14 J marries OW 1/24/15 "No matter where you go, there you are"
FWIW - this seems normal to me. Your S may very well be sullen. When he is around his father, OW, and her kids. I can't imagine what his thoughts would be when he spends time with is father. But I do imagine that it's building and needs some sort of outlet. If not with you, then elsewhere. Running from it may not be the only answer he has; but he could avoid his father for a very long time at his age. I'm sure he's thought about it
AJ
"Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter" MLK Put the glass down... "Yesterday I was clever so I wanted to change the world Today I am wise, so I am changing myself."
Well it's been a long time everyone. Hope all is well with all of you...
Life continues to be great. The new guy (NG) and I still continue to do well. Our relationship is progressing smoothly. Funny how I thought my "picker" was broken. I thought I was destined to find losers for the rest of my life. But NG is a wonderful man who treats me like I deserve to be treated...with respect. It's such a concept to me and this relationship seems almost too easy. I'm still treading with caution, but I am not so much waiting for the other shoe to drop like I was before.
With EX, life is still crazy. He and Griszelda (OW) are still getting married in January, almost exactly 6 months after the D is final. S is the best man and D is flower girl. S told me D's dress is 5 sizes too large and the ugliest thing he has ever seen. I guess they are getting hitched in the town where OW's dad lives. According to what OW's ex told me, the kids have to stay in their hometown with their father since the courts will not allow them to move so OW is going to have two homes. One week she will live in my town with J and the next week she will live in the town where her kids live. I guess she will be renting an apartment?? Whatever. That's not a very peaceful life to live. But it ain't me or my kids so whatever.
D did tell me the other day her dad needed my address because dad and OW wanted to send me an invitation to the wedding. Seriously, I LOL'd hysterically when she told me that. As if... It will be a cold day in h*ll before that will happen.
Tonight D is in a production of The Nutcracker. I am going and NG is coming with his two kids. S and EX will be there as well. This is going to be interesting. I still don't think EX knows I am dating. Not that it is any of his business.
WH
AT BD: WH 41, J 43; Bomb 2/5/2012 Two kids, one dog D Final 6/18/14 J marries OW 1/24/15 "No matter where you go, there you are"
wishing, I'm so glad you returned to update us a bit. I hope you and your family had a nice Thanksgiving and it's now on to the big Christmas holiday festivities. I'm sure your D is going to be so cute in the Nutcracker this evening. Be sure to take plenty of photos! I wouldn't worry to much about what your xh has to say about the new man in your life, as you rightly pointed out....it's none of his business what you do any longer. But I bet his eyes will be glue to you and the new man this evening and he'll be posing questions to the kids about him. LOL!
I'm sorry to hear that the two nutty buddies are getting married. That is going to be something to stay away from. Toxic to the hilt. It's going to be interesting how long she's going to go back and forth visiting her kids. I'm glad her h had enough sense to work w/the courts and keep the children in his area. A marriage based on lies, etc., will begin to crumble in time because the "shine" will wear off once all of the festivities are over and done with. The Ball will be over the masks will be removed and I wouldn't want to be around to see that unmasking take place some time in the future.
Wishing, you struggled a lot w/your situation, but you've come a long way. You and your children have a lot to be proud of. You've made it on your own and have had many ups and downs...you're an inspiration to all that read your postings. I'm very happy to see that life has turned those lemons into lemonade for you. I wish you, your new man and your family a very happy holiday season.
Don't be a stranger...come back and post so that we know that all is well w/you and your family.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
