How to Fling an Otter Across Two States

[kml]

Aren't you getting temporary support from SMokey? How much is that?

[kml]

And as for that extra income:

- technical writing on the side

- tutoring on the side

- babysitting on the side

- weekend dog boarding

- rice and beans - read the Tightwad Gazette books and the Mr Money Mustache website for ideas on lowering food bills

[Atsbaby]

(((Lois)))

It will work out. Keep being positive. God works in mysterious ways!

[LoisB]

Thanks Everyone. :-)

I asked for more money this morning.

I'm not sure I will get it, but I asked. I figure that this company knows I'm moving my 12-year-old and the special circumstances and I'm single...I need enough income to at least comfortably afford a decent 2-bedroom place. We shall see.

Smokey has been paying $1,000 per month. Until the house issue is settled, I'm trying to arrange things so I don't have to contribute to the mortgage. He can continue to pay the mortgage until the house sells. I thought about being a diccck and just walking away...but, my credit has suffered enough. He also pays the car insurance. I'd like that to continue as well. That leaves me with $200 he pays in cash.

Thinking out loud here. It's been four months since I gave Smokey's FIL the dissolution proposal...the FAIR d. proposal...

I just want a decent place to live...and I want to see my D12 excited about the move, like she was yesterday. Everyone would have their own bedroom, it's a beautiful place, big front porch, fenced in yard for the dog, nice neighbors...we met...two bathrooms...lovely and light and airy and FULL OF HOPE.

Say a prayer peeps. If settled, I could get down to the business of moving and starting my new job.

[job]

I agree w/Wonka...time for a very serious family meeting, not only to discuss the move, but also finances. Your oldest D is old enough to get a full time job and if she wants to take some classes in the evening, she can work that out on her own. However, your belt is going to be tight trying to make ends meet for a while that you aren't going to be able to make any promises about what you can pay for D20 in the near future.

Also, your h most likely will not continue to pay your car insurance once the dust settles and you are divorced. That is going to be another bill that both you and your D will need to pay in the coming year or so.

Heather, I know you are looking for other ways to make money, but you need to think about what your new position will entail. It could mean you working after hours in order to meet deadlines, etc. You will also need to home school your youngest D, again more of your precious free time.

I'm not trying to rain on your parade because I want to see you succeed, but you've got a lot of money issues that will need to be resolved at some point and the first one is making sure that your oldest D understands that she's got to find a job, keep it and provide you w/a small monthly rent fee. No waffling on this because if you do, you are the one that's going to have to be out there digging around looking for additional work to supplement your income.

Also, you will need to inquire as to how the utility companies operate. Some of them require a fee for putting the utilities in your name, i.e., switching the service on. You might want to check into that as well.

BTW, even though I'm concerned about your money issue, I'm very glad you did find a place that everyone would be happy with. I'm keeping you in my thoughts and prayers and hope that everything works out.

[Georgiabelle]

Heather,

You've received some very sound advice. Yes, your oldest D needs to contribute. When I was 20, I was a senior in college and had been earning money since I was 9 and I'm certainly not unique in that regard. I took out loans and paid for the raining part of school myself. Again, it's not a bad thing to ask your D to contribute.

There are all kinds of ways of being thrifty and I understand the home part. However, you don't want to spend the vast majority of your income on housing, coupled with utilities and you could find yourself in an extremely precarious position. Is the house close to work? Please keep in mind any potential unexpected expenses (automotive). Does this position have benefits?

Please know I am not trying to be a downer. I'm thrilled that you have the chance to start anew with your girls and have a job opp you are excited about. However, I'm just encouraging you to prep as best you can.

[LoisB]

I just don't want to give the impression that I'm a whiner with this new company. I asked for $3000 per year. I figured I'd shoot a lil high and hope I can get a bit above what they originally offered.

I'm basing my figures on 30% of my monthly income.

[juliegayle]

Heather

I know this is very belated but Congrats on your decision to take the job and move up north!

Julie

[LoisB]

Thanks for all the support and thought.

Yes, the rent is ridiculously high on this property...scary high. Sadly, that's the average for this area. I knew that going in. And, I already decided that we are not going to continue living hand-to-mouth. If we sign this lease, I need to have some things in place so I don't need to feel the month-to-month pressure anymore.

I haven't heard anything back from the paper yet. I did drop into the office and smile, shake hands, pick up MY Paper!!! and download the software so I can tap into the network and begin learning the page design.

We are home safely, choc lab and all.

Um, I think I need a day to gather my thoughts and carefully consider. I've been so busy and have been driving for days...even when we got to our destination...we were driving around looking at places.

I need a day without constant questions from the kids...CONSTANT. When are we doing this? Will we do this? How will we do this? Etc...Are we taking this MOM? Hey, Mom, are we getting a new microwave?

[BklynMom]

OMG, I thought the constant questions would end when they were 12… please don't tell me it continues. I don't want to know.

Actually the fact that I now only have 2 people constantly asking me questions is one of the bonuses of being D - my ex was constantly asking me about what to do about every little detail.

You are doing AWESOME