Stomach is in knots, feel like throwing up. Please pray for me to remain calm and collected. Pray for me to say the right things. In less than two hours we have an one on one.
Me 37 H 37 D9 D6 M9/ T12 ILYBINILWY 05/2013 Asked to S 06/13 Said he wants to S for sure 08/13 Said that he's looking for a place (Sept 17/13) No ring on his finger (Sept 19/13)
I was able to keep calm during the entire conversation. I forgot to validate sometimes. We met and he talked about why he wants to leave.. Basically repeating the same things...blah blah blah. He is still on a different wavelength than I am. He feels justified for what he is doing.
He feels that he has done enough soul searching to know that he is not making a huge mistake letting me go and that he has done lots of research when it comes to the effect that it has on kids. I could not help myself to tell him, that he has no clue whatsoever how bad it's going to be. Oh and yes, I started detaching more, and because of that he thinks that I am treating him like nothing, like a dog ( I honestly don't, I just keep conversations brief....). He also feels that the kids are following my atttitude, which is not true, they are acting exactly the same, the difference is that now he is paying more attention to what they do, more than ever before.
He asked if I thought it would be a good idea for him to come to my IC...because we have different versions as to what happened....is that a good idea?
This morning, he said good morning and apologized for being hard on me. I really am feeling like a boomerang. Up and down all the time. He asked me : do you eat, what did you eat, did you sleep ect....next thing you know, he is being mean with me, reminding me how he feels about me etc....
Sick to my stomach
Me 37 H 37 D9 D6 M9/ T12 ILYBINILWY 05/2013 Asked to S 06/13 Said he wants to S for sure 08/13 Said that he's looking for a place (Sept 17/13) No ring on his finger (Sept 19/13)
Thank you Cadet, it was hard, but because of this forum and the book, I knew I had to be calm
Originally Posted By: Cadet
You are going to learn that talking, counseling, is a waste of time.
I was not sure that he was mentioning going with me to shut me up, or really meant it, until I remember someone n this forum saying that WAS can fake it. I will continue to go.
Originally Posted By: Cadet
You need to let him go.
It hurts just thinking about it, especially when I think what it will do to my kids
Originally Posted By: Cadet
It is the only chance that you might get him back.
That's what I want, I want him to want me back, to want our family back. I will do anything
Me 37 H 37 D9 D6 M9/ T12 ILYBINILWY 05/2013 Asked to S 06/13 Said he wants to S for sure 08/13 Said that he's looking for a place (Sept 17/13) No ring on his finger (Sept 19/13)
After I dropped off the kid, I came back to bed fully clothed, went under the covers. I need to get up, take a shower and do something. Because being in bed is not helping at all.
Me 37 H 37 D9 D6 M9/ T12 ILYBINILWY 05/2013 Asked to S 06/13 Said he wants to S for sure 08/13 Said that he's looking for a place (Sept 17/13) No ring on his finger (Sept 19/13)
Just found out that my mom found out what's going on and she is coming from overseas to give me support.
The other thing is that I am freaking out cause I now know that he is looking for an apartment and now
He just said that he is thinking about taking the kids with him to his parents 5 hours away: what do I think?
I am freaking out, cause I do not know what to do, actually I just want to strangle him. But what I really want are my kids. I did not answer his question about thanksgiving. Then h says, or we can stay here and have thanksgiving together. My oldest will be crushed, she always goes to my in laws for thanksgiving. What irks me is that in both scenarios he is there and I am not?
Does anyone know what to do in this situation? I am lost...have not thought about holidays... I don't know.... Please help
Me 37 H 37 D9 D6 M9/ T12 ILYBINILWY 05/2013 Asked to S 06/13 Said he wants to S for sure 08/13 Said that he's looking for a place (Sept 17/13) No ring on his finger (Sept 19/13)
Me 37 H 37 D9 D6 M9/ T12 ILYBINILWY 05/2013 Asked to S 06/13 Said he wants to S for sure 08/13 Said that he's looking for a place (Sept 17/13) No ring on his finger (Sept 19/13)
What I mean is that h wants to take the kids away for thanksgiving
Me 37 H 37 D9 D6 M9/ T12 ILYBINILWY 05/2013 Asked to S 06/13 Said he wants to S for sure 08/13 Said that he's looking for a place (Sept 17/13) No ring on his finger (Sept 19/13)
