Previous Thread
Next Thread
Print Thread
Page 8 of 10 1 2 6 7 8 9 10
Joined: Mar 2011
Posts: 4,866
Likes: 1
~
Member
Offline
Member
~
Joined: Mar 2011
Posts: 4,866
Likes: 1
Before you answer yes to her, are you willing to tape your mouth?

The ONLY way you should entertain meeting with her to talk would be in order to listen, possibly validate, and then tell her that you will think about what she said and that you have to go do [ insert something that you plan to do that is valid in order to remove yourself from an awkward situation where you think you should speak, when really you shouldn't ].

Be completely honest with yourself on whether you can NOT say anything, just listen. Can you do that?

Joined: Apr 2013
Posts: 63
E
Member
OP Offline
Member
E
Joined: Apr 2013
Posts: 63
Tape my mouth and listen and vadilate what she says.
I will speak nothing about the mediation.
I respond to her request with a simple message. " hi w ( her name) my phone is still the same ###-###-####"

Joined: Mar 2011
Posts: 4,866
Likes: 1
~
Member
Offline
Member
~
Joined: Mar 2011
Posts: 4,866
Likes: 1
good.

and good luck.

please don't expect her to "hollywood movie" this ending. She might just want to "coach" you on how to conduct yourself at mediation or try to drill you for info.

Let us know how it goes.

Joined: Apr 2013
Posts: 63
E
Member
OP Offline
Member
E
Joined: Apr 2013
Posts: 63
I do not know whether to cry or laugh about the Hollywood comment.
I will post how it goes.
Thank you

I can say this past week has been filled with new experiences new people, an has been somewhat surreal for me. So one never knows...

Joined: Apr 2013
Posts: 63
E
Member
OP Offline
Member
E
Joined: Apr 2013
Posts: 63
I do not think she is going to call. I may have gotten my hopes up.

Joined: Apr 2013
Posts: 63
E
Member
OP Offline
Member
E
Joined: Apr 2013
Posts: 63
She did not call. frown
One day I will swallow the frog in my throat and it will eat the butterflies in my stomache.

Joined: Mar 2011
Posts: 4,866
Likes: 1
~
Member
Offline
Member
~
Joined: Mar 2011
Posts: 4,866
Likes: 1
Unfortunately, that's often the case. One of the reasons why we say "Believe none of what they say and only 50% of what they do."

That phrase tends to have more accuracy with MLC than WAS, it still is something for LBS to keep in mind.

A meeting to talk, upcoming D process, working on the M, leaving the house, coming back... we can be told any number of things and those things don't necessarily happen.

Keep your hopes low and your expectations even lower and keep working on detaching your emotions from her words or actions.

These sitchs can turn around certainly, we just have to keep working on ourselves because that's all we can control.

Joined: Apr 2013
Posts: 63
E
Member
OP Offline
Member
E
Joined: Apr 2013
Posts: 63
Kaffe thank you for your support. I had good session with my therapist this evening. I realize all my anxious moments only come out when I deal with my w. I had a very pleasant week until she crushed it with her falsified tales.

Joined: Apr 2013
Posts: 63
E
Member
OP Offline
Member
E
Joined: Apr 2013
Posts: 63
mediation in a few hours. Going to my best to state what is best for me!
Got no sleep feel awful

Joined: Mar 2011
Posts: 4,866
Likes: 1
~
Member
Offline
Member
~
Joined: Mar 2011
Posts: 4,866
Likes: 1
good luck.

Page 8 of 10 1 2 6 7 8 9 10

Moderated by  Cadet, DnJ, job, Michele Weiner-Davis 

Link Copied to Clipboard