anxiety attack

[ClingingToHope]

I remember one day my XW called me at work and demanded that I stay home the next day with D9, who was sick.

I wasn't in a good place then still I was happy with what I said.

I told her she "couldn't demand that I do something." She could ask. She hung up.

It could be a simple boundaries statement. When we talk I will not be yelled at, swore at ....

It's a tough spot. I'm glad I didn't really face that.

[d1adsl5a]

Well court is over. I am officially divorced. During pretrial my EX WIFE..commented on my shoes that they looked expensive. He only buys "allen edmonds" she says. I just looked at and said, really? They are 6 years old...

Oh and i also had to give up the leaf blower because she demanded that too. I did sleep last night(usually my insomnia is in full force before a court date) , but I am just tired, relived. Looking forward to my new life...

figgeroni, sorry to hear that the boys dad is such a mess.

She can no longer hurt me, threaten me, control me...I am free today...

[ClingingToHope]

I'm no engine expert, but isn't there something that you could put in it to cause it seize up?

Just a -- mean -- thought.

When it was over for me people would say congratulations and I didn't know how to take it. Divorce is sad. It's a death of what could have been.

That being said, it sounds like yours was such a mess that congratulations may work here.

So congratulations.

[d1adsl5a]

not a bad thought...

The funny part is even when she had no money, she borrowed $20,000 from daddy to but a new toyota 4runner. Used? not for my ex...

I don't disagree it is sad. But I have to tell you, I just feel the fear lifting a way a bit today...

[figgeroni]

Divorce was bittersweet for me...

I was certainly glad when it happened but I wished it had never gotten to that point

[bright_new_day]

Divorce was bittersweet for me...

I was certainly glad when it happened but I wished it had never gotten to that point

Ditto. I still feel that somewhere along the way it definitely could have been fixed.....but cest la vie. It is hard to fix a marriage when your partner believes all the problem lie in you.

I am happy now. Happier than I had been for so many years.

[bright_new_day]

I just wanted to share something with you. I was scared of my exH for a long time. he tore me down, I was scared ot speak up in fear of losing him. I knew his personality.

Now that he is gone, I have nothing to lose. So when he tries to bully me, I stand firm, and guess what. He backs down.

I lived with fear as well. My ex first mentioned divorce 3-4 years into our marriage. We stayed married for another 16 years, and I had the constant fear that he would divorce me. I lived with that insecurity and fear for 16 years. I became a shell of a person who at one point was having anxiety attacks because I was afraid I would do something wrong, and consequently I never seemed to do anything right...and was constantly told that I never did anything right. Who knew that him leaving would be such a positive in my life. I completely lost who I was when I was married, and divorce brough me back! And I speak my mind now and could not care less what he thinks! It is definitely liberating!

[bright_new_day]

Even more ironic is that the person he ending up not liking in me, was the one he really created. The one who became defensive and up tight.

Yep, I may be a bitch, but I'm the bitch you created!!!