[LITB]

I just received a TM from my W asking again if we can talk tonight about the kids going to NM on July 16th. I have been able to buy myself an extra week to get all of the legal paperwork worked out, however today she will find out. I replied letting her know we can talk.

I hate doing this to the woman I care and love for more than she will ever know. I feel horrible.

My kids are still under the impression that they are moving to NM. I'll have to explain to them that they are not and why. It is a delicate situation, especially for D8. She has asked me twice why mommy moved? I have been able to deflect the question, however I will have to prepare myself to answer her in the best way possible.

When I opened the attachments from my L last night, my heart dropped. There is absolutely no mercy in the way they are written. TBH, I hurt for my W having to do this.

My head is swimming. Ultimately I would like to R my M, however this might create an insurmountable obstacle.

I'm curious if any of you vets have been down a similar path and have been able to R?

[Redo]

Yea I too would like to know the vets feedback.

In my case my wife is still the primary caregiver. We agreed on more visitations for me. I am okay with the schedule now.

In your case, unless i understood wrong, you are asking for sole custody. Yup that legal language can be hard. I should know. I was at the receiving end of it.

I dunno, maybe you can talk to wife to see if she's willing to come back to your town. Then you would not have this issue.

See in my case my wife badly wanted to be close to her family.

I'd say, try to get more suggestions before you tell her.

[LITB]

See in my case my wife badly wanted to be close to her family.

My W moved to NM for the same reason. As of right now, she does not want to live up here. She told me point blank that I was going to make it ugly and keep her here. Believe me, I tried to work things out as peacefully as possible. I was even going to try to move to NM. It just isn't that easy. TBH, I have no desire to live in NM. I suppose that is besides the point right now.

[Redo]

I know what you mean man. I cannot move to my wife's town because of my job. But even if i could, i would not. My wife has 40+ members of her family there. It is like a circus.

The only reason i let her stay there is because i knew if she stays near her family, she's safer emotionally. It would also let my daughter get some sense of family.

[♪CS♪]

I wish I had some great advice for you I could share, but I really have no idea.

This is a tough spot for you, hope it goes as well as possible.

I still believe a conversation with your W before she receives the paperwork could prove positive. I would suggest keeping it verbal rather than email, etc.

[LITB]

I know what you mean man. I cannot move to my wife's town because of my job. But even if i could, i would not. My wife has 40+ members of her family there. It is like a circus.

That made me laugh. I hear you on that. I like to live close to my family, but still far enough.

I wish I had some great advice for you I could share, but I really have no idea.

This is a tough spot for you, hope it goes as well as possible.

I still believe a conversation with your W before she receives the paperwork could prove positive. I would suggest keeping it verbal rather than email, etc.

Thanks Country. I agree with you on a verbal convo instead of an email. She is so unsuspecting to what is about to happen, I am devastated for her.

I just talked to my L, she reiterated that she feels that everything needs to be included and, "keep in mind that we did not say anything that is not true or that is exaggerated in the papers". I know she is right, but it doesn't make me feel any better.

[LITB]

I forgot to mention that the paperwork shows the mediation is to take place the morning of her 40th birthday. Talk about adding insult to injury. You can't draft up a better script for this crap.

[LITB]

Another thing for me to worry about. Now that my L is filing the injunctive order, my W will have to be served with the docs. Unfortunately since her mom has been in the hospital and now transferred to a rehabilitation center, she is usually not home. It's likely that she will have to be served at work.

[LearningPatience]

Is there any way that your L could arrange to have your W go somewhere to sign the papers? As I told someone in a different post, for my 1st D, my L arranged it so that exW went into his office to sign so that she didn't have to be served.

[LITB]

Is there any way that your L could arrange to have your W go somewhere to sign the papers? As I told someone in a different post, for my 1st D, my L arranged it so that exW went into his office to sign so that she didn't have to be served.

I am not sure LP. I just sent my L an email letting her know about the possible challenges of getting my W served. I suppose things might clear up a bit after my convo with my W tonight and a response from my L.

I am trying to prepare myself for what is going to take place with our convo. Starsky gave me some great advice. I hope to start the convo out with normal talk and ease my way into the eye of the storm.

I mentioned that I no longer had fear of a lot of things, however I fear for my W's well being. It su@ks. The part of not rescuing is apparently a difficult one for me when it comes to detachment. I want to save her, however I know that I can't.

I have to keep reminding myself that this is for the best interest of my kids.