Two days of him no contact. No skype no email.. I would have been fine with that except my almost 4 yr old girl had a crying fit asking me to call Daddy on his computer. Heartbreaking listening to her sobbing for over 10 minutes.
Also I got worried... http://www.wbay.com/story/14844253/8-killed-in-separate-attacks-across-iraq The news said attack happened in eastern Baghdad, he is in western Baghdad....still it's really very selfish of him not to contact anybody (if he's able to call / email or skype)so at least we know that he's safe.
I did bootcamp today and I feel pretty stoked. I was able to keep up with the young uns in that class. Physically I am strong - I wish I can say the same thing internally. I will get there.
Me 43 / H 36 M 3 / T5 S18/ D17 with 1st H D3 D1 H Emotionally detached March 2011 I dont love you May 17 2011 Husband is deployed
Sandy thanks for checking up on me..I haven't had the chance to post here because my babies and I are practically living in/by the pool - it's so hot here. I am actually smiling a lot and doing so many fun stuff with the babies. I love summertime. I went to IC couple of times - I am looking for a different person - he didn't help much and very very pro-divorce. I was hoping he can help ME sort out some of my issues but he keeps on saying the root of my unhappiness is my husband and that I should throw the towel now.
Yes husband finally did email me on Wednesday. Then we skype for a bit. He was cold to me but very loving to the babies. We didnt stay long and said goodbye after 8 minutes. I didn't email either (before I would email him every night before going to sleep just as a recap of the things we did and you know to make him feel part of our family and just something from home). I then received a one-liner email from him on Thursday and Friday. Basically he was asking me why we're not online... and for me to find time to skype with them FOR babies sake... so I don't think it's because he's thinking "OMG what is she upto, why is she not sitting and waiting like she used to do by her laptop"? Yep I was that pathetic since November Sandi - I had always worked our appts over his schedule (he works long hours there and sporadic times so can't really tell me when he will be online and also he's inconsiderate that sometimes he will be back in his room and just don't want to deal with anything and won't go online - meanwhile I am waiting online with the babies until 3pm so our day is over by then.
Journaling. Thursday email from him - I ignored it and didn't reply.
I didn't catch you guys online yesterday? Will you online to skype today?
2nd email - Friday That's two days in a row I logged onto skype and couldn't talk to my babies. What are you guys up too? Are they doing alright? Will I get the chance to skpye with them tonight? I hope so.
I then answered his email We didn't see any missed call.. so we didn't know you were even online...just try to call - if were here we will get online. We had been staying at the pool and having a blast.
Here's his reply Thanks for replying. Things are as good as they can be. Good the kiddos are having fun at the pool but for them take the time to skype with me. Thank you.
He then called on skype three times yesterday. Finally got me (babies were napping) he was detached. I stayed online about 5 minutes (looking very distracted and uninterested to what he is saying)..then I said goodbye.
This morning no one-liner email. My sister said - by acting this way...I am shutting chances of him thinking of staying in our marriage. He needs the support from me because he is in a bad place mentally and he is trying to pull himself out of his own pit by aggrandizing his contributions to the marriage and his "sacrifice" to try and make it work. She told me - I have to suck it up and still be very supportive.. that means.. loving emails/care package and all..
This morning no one-liner email. My sister said - by acting this way...I am shutting chances of him thinking of staying in our marriage. He needs the support from me because he is in a bad place mentally and he is trying to pull himself out of his own pit by aggrandizing his contributions to the marriage and his "sacrifice" to try and make it work. She told me - I have to suck it up and still be very supportive.. that means.. loving emails/care package and all..
Did you tell your sister what you told us?
Quote:
I then received a one-liner email from him on Thursday and Friday. Basically he was asking me why we're not online... and for me to find time to skype with them FOR babies sake... so I don't think it's because he's thinking "OMG what is she upto, why is she not sitting and waiting like she used to do by her laptop"? Yep I was that pathetic since November Sandi - I had always worked our appts over his schedule (he works long hours there and sporadic times so can't really tell me when he will be online and also he's inconsiderate that sometimes he will be back in his room and just don't want to deal with anything and won't go online - meanwhile I am waiting online with the babies until 3pm so our day is over by then.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I thought you had already tried the sucking up plan and it didn't work very well.
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
