Detachment was tough last night. Sat on couch with W and S watching a movie. W grabbed her cell phone a few dozen times to look at a text or FB msg. I wanted to ask who it was, but I didn't.
Me 46 W 43 M 17 S 14 D 11 ILYB 9/2010 EA began July/August 2010 ? PA began Nov/Dec 2010 ? I began DB in Jan 2011 I filed 7/12/11 Kids and I moved out 7/30/11 I'm in it for the kids and me.
My W continues to speak regularly with OM "friend". I haven't brought it up, but I'm sure the topic will come up at some point. Just need some advice and how I should react when it does.
Me 46 W 43 M 17 S 14 D 11 ILYB 9/2010 EA began July/August 2010 ? PA began Nov/Dec 2010 ? I began DB in Jan 2011 I filed 7/12/11 Kids and I moved out 7/30/11 I'm in it for the kids and me.
W was watching TV upstairs in bed, the bachelor. I went up to get ready to sleep and asked "do you often watch this show?". She instantly snaps at me and asks if I have a problem with that. Apparently, she didn't like my tone of voice. She seems to have a very short temper around me, and she even snaps at the kids. She has a lot of bitterness and resentment about her life, being unemployed, and it seems that she directs a lot of her negative energy towards me. I'm trying my best to walk away when she has these moments and not let myself get baited. I realize she feels trapped in her current life and unable to escape because of the kids and her limited financial resources. I continue to resist the urge to help or fix her issues, and I just keep working on 180, GAL, and detachment.
Me 46 W 43 M 17 S 14 D 11 ILYB 9/2010 EA began July/August 2010 ? PA began Nov/Dec 2010 ? I began DB in Jan 2011 I filed 7/12/11 Kids and I moved out 7/30/11 I'm in it for the kids and me.
W was watching TV upstairs in bed, the bachelor. I went up to get ready to sleep and asked "do you often watch this show?". She instantly snaps at me and asks if I have a problem with that. Apparently, she didn't like my tone of voice. She seems to have a very short temper around me, and she even snaps at the kids. She has a lot of bitterness and resentment about her life, being unemployed, and it seems that she directs a lot of her negative energy towards me. I'm trying my best to walk away when she has these moments and not let myself get baited. I realize she feels trapped in her current life and unable to escape because of the kids and her limited financial resources. I continue to resist the urge to help or fix her issues, and I just keep working on 180, GAL, and detachment.
Me 46 W 43 M 17 S 14 D 11 ILYB 9/2010 EA began July/August 2010 ? PA began Nov/Dec 2010 ? I began DB in Jan 2011 I filed 7/12/11 Kids and I moved out 7/30/11 I'm in it for the kids and me.
I'm out getting a life tonight. Just checking on my posts from 2 days ago. J
Me 46 W 43 M 17 S 14 D 11 ILYB 9/2010 EA began July/August 2010 ? PA began Nov/Dec 2010 ? I began DB in Jan 2011 I filed 7/12/11 Kids and I moved out 7/30/11 I'm in it for the kids and me.
I'm out getting a life tonight. Just checking on my posts from 2 days ago. J
Me 46 W 43 M 17 S 14 D 11 ILYB 9/2010 EA began July/August 2010 ? PA began Nov/Dec 2010 ? I began DB in Jan 2011 I filed 7/12/11 Kids and I moved out 7/30/11 I'm in it for the kids and me.
As part of my 180 I have begun to assume control of more of the family money. I told my w that I would take care of the tax filing this year. She has handled it in the past, but I nicely told her that I can handle it and I need to be more involved in these matters. She was surprised and a bit irritated, probably because she thought I didn't trust her with the tax refund money, and partly because she had already decided how to spend it. In the past my w has made financial decisio ns without consulting me, but that's over now.
Me 46 W 43 M 17 S 14 D 11 ILYB 9/2010 EA began July/August 2010 ? PA began Nov/Dec 2010 ? I began DB in Jan 2011 I filed 7/12/11 Kids and I moved out 7/30/11 I'm in it for the kids and me.
Me 46 W 43 M 17 S 14 D 11 ILYB 9/2010 EA began July/August 2010 ? PA began Nov/Dec 2010 ? I began DB in Jan 2011 I filed 7/12/11 Kids and I moved out 7/30/11 I'm in it for the kids and me.
My W just suddenly realized that her 2 years of unemployment checks were almost up and she would need to get a part time job in order to finish school. I saw on the internet history that she has been surfing the web for education loan information and grants. She has previously stated that she wants to finish school on her own and doesn't anyone else to have to support her. I think part of this is her guilt in taking any financial assistance from me since she has already written-off the M in her mind and probably feels bad about past financial damage she has caused to me. I would like to tell her that I can help support her through school since we are a team, but I think if she accepts my help she will be obligated to me which increases her sense of feeling trapped in the M.
Me 46 W 43 M 17 S 14 D 11 ILYB 9/2010 EA began July/August 2010 ? PA began Nov/Dec 2010 ? I began DB in Jan 2011 I filed 7/12/11 Kids and I moved out 7/30/11 I'm in it for the kids and me.
Checking the internet history tonight. I often check it since I have a teen age son who uses my PC. I noticed that my W downloaded a marriage announcement sent from a friend. I asked her 2 days ago if she heard when the wedding would be scheduled, she said she didn't know. The friend recently lost his father and W said the friend was probably too busy to worry about marriage arrangements. This friend is someone my W grew up with and I am not close with him. M wife was obviously lying to me since the wedding is only 2 weeks away and she probably doesn't intend to bring me. We live together and sleep in the same bed so I'm wondering if she is going to make up a "going out with the girls" story or tell me the truth. Give her track record I predict a lie. One interesting note, the suspected OM from my W youth is also friends with the guy who is getting married. I wonder if she plans to spend the night with him? Should I confront that I know about the wedding, or should I play along with the lie and just keep a hapy face?
Me 46 W 43 M 17 S 14 D 11 ILYB 9/2010 EA began July/August 2010 ? PA began Nov/Dec 2010 ? I began DB in Jan 2011 I filed 7/12/11 Kids and I moved out 7/30/11 I'm in it for the kids and me.
