I would love to go dancing but to selfconcious about my weight. go back to the gym, i'd have to rejoin but feel like i'm taking away the time from the kids with me working and all.
Me 39 H 30 d 18 previous marriage d 2.5 with H s 4.5months with H Seperation Nov09 july i'm dim to dark - set internal deadline
I would love to go dancing but to selfconcious about my weight. go back to the gym, i'd have to rejoin but feel like i'm taking away the time from the kids with me working and all.
Do it anyway........For you..
Question here....
This will and can consume a person quickly....
IF that is the case....
How can you be the rock for you and your children, if you have nothing for yourself ?
go back to the gym, i'd have to rejoin but feel like i'm taking away the time from the kids with me working and all.
I thought this too, but I'm going to join next week. I found a gym where membership includes childcare, and I asked D if she'd like to have a play date once a week while Mama goes to exercise class. She thought it sounded like lots of fun. This gym also has a recreational pool, so on weekends I can take D swimming, sort of as a reward for not minding that she is essentially going to day care twice in one day.
Okay, I guess I just needed to be told that it is okay to work all day then take kids to be watched while I work out. Maybe I will start slow, weekends, then add to it as i go on to 2-3 times a week.
Ages of my kids are 3 and 9 months, the 19 year old is out of state.
Me 39 H 30 d 18 previous marriage d 2.5 with H s 4.5months with H Seperation Nov09 july i'm dim to dark - set internal deadline
net down so only can surf at work, many sites blocked.
h brought daughter to my classroom today, poked his head in
he was 15 minutes late this morning, i did not yell at him or call him names, i said that when he is late i can not pump milk for son 9 months,.
when we spoke on phone, only talk was about kids, he could have gotten off, he was getting subway with d3, but remained on phone, i cut it off somewhat and was first to end convo...
again daughter asks every single day if daddy can come home, my response is oh yeah sure, daddy is welcome anytime he wants to come home. not sure if this is the right response but it lets me off being the bad guy, i'm not sure...
Me 39 H 30 d 18 previous marriage d 2.5 with H s 4.5months with H Seperation Nov09 july i'm dim to dark - set internal deadline
had a few days with no arguments with h on the drop off and pickups, wore my new clothes, he did not say anything, always have my hair and makeup done.
brought d3 to my room when she got out of class, he poked his head in and stood in the door so everyone could see him.
no questions about holidays, he just said to d3, he's off thursday because of thanksgiving.
got an update from court on previous spouse, positive financial outcome.
i really have no clue how i am going to get h and i to a point where we are communicating like friends or something
Me 39 H 30 d 18 previous marriage d 2.5 with H s 4.5months with H Seperation Nov09 july i'm dim to dark - set internal deadline
I'm glad you are having positives: had a few days with no arguments with h on the drop off and pickups,
And this is great for the PMA!
wore my new clothes, he did not say anything, always have my hair and makeup done
You have learned that 'setting boundaries' isn't working in your situation. You need a new approach. Look at the power packaging thread, and really do the work listed.
What motivates your husband? Does he like to be asked his opinion. You mentioned he walked in the room so he could be 'seen'. Why do you think that is?
Update: he was 15 minutes late this morning, i did not yell at him or call him names, i said that when he is late i can not pump milk for son 9 months,.
This was very good--not only because you didn't yell or call him names (I imagine you know that is never a good idea)--but you explained the IMPACT of what his being late means to you and your children. In a warmer friendlier voice....say it like you would say it to someone you're really close to. That's all you really need to do. Then drop it. And watch his behavior in the next few times after. It doesn't mean he won't slip up, but he might make an effort next time.
