Thanks Bond, you may be right. From one of my classes I have we are discussing what your mind can do to you. How sometimes what we believe is the truth is only what our mind tells us is the truth. I have a great example that happened to me today. When I got to school I saw one of my class mates outside. I told him I had all my homework done but was having a problem with one of the questions. When I told him which one he said I was doing the wrong assignment. I was supposed to do Case # 3 in section one. Right off the bat I panicked and thought S%it. How could I have screwed up? Well I went to class early and looked at my notes and guess what? I DID DO THE RIGHT ASSIGNMENT. (This was a “feel good moment”) But see my brain was telling me that the “truth” was that I screwed up. I did not have confidence in myself. Of course I could have done the wrong one but instead of just thinking I should see if I did or not I automatically thought I was wrong…
Had another ‘feel good” moment last night. We had MIL over for a BBQ. It was nice outside so wife asked her if she wanted to go out and look at my flower garden. MIL is 88 yrs old. So here I was looking outside to see wife helping her mom around our yard showing her my work… Also today when I got home from school wife called me into her office and showed me a link on her computer for the author of the self help book on positive thinking. It turns out that he was an instructor at the college I am attending. This feel good moment is that w IS reading this book and IS looking for a way to improve her. (And it gives us something to discuss)
Ok wish me luck tonight with dancing w the stars
Doc
Journaling...
And if I claim to be a wise man, well It surely means that I don't know
I sat through the program and it was not that bad. CL was that you dancing with paula?
Ok now CL I need your help. What kind of dancing could a guy with a stiff leg. (no puns) do? During the show I did mention that maybe W and I should take some kind of dancing lesons.. She didn't say anything about my statement but then agian she did not say something like "ya right"... Maybe I could do it. I would be willing to try if there was a type of dance I was able to do.
And if I claim to be a wise man, well It surely means that I don't know
I can't believe I'm seeing these words from you again! Being sexually assertive and confident has NOTHING to do with force or coercion. ZERO. It has NOTHING to do with ignoring when a woman says "NO.' "NO" continues to mean no.
I've been quiet because I hoped MrBond might inspire you to move you away from sexual passivity where my efforts have failed.
But now I see you saying pretty much exactly the same thing as you did two years ago, about rape, force, etc... You are driving me nuts.
A sexually assured, confident, assertive, strong man does not force or coerce a woman into sex. If she says no, he STOPS immediately and respectfully without pouting or storming off or whimpering or whining or being needy. He certainly does not engage non-consensual activity.
But nor does he sit around passively, making hesitating, tentative platonic gestures and think they will lead to any sex, let alone hot sex. Again, you keep waiting for some kind of external event (a wedding, a party, whatever) to make the difference. An external event is not going to seduce your W or make you into a sexual being. You need to do both yourself. Perhaps you might try reading PM again?
Now, as for SCHOOL, you seem to be enjoying it and gaining confidence. This is so great for you -- yay Doc!!. Plus, apart from the other obvious benefits, these things will also make you more attractive sexually :-) And great job sharing the dancing show with W :-)
Doc, I saw a video of a guy dancing salsa with one leg and a crutch. He did it with style.
How much mobility do you have in your leg?
East Coast Swing can be danced with small steps. West Coast Swing is more of a walking type of dance. Salsa can be done in a small space. Foxtrot is also a walking type of dance.
If you're open to it, you should give it a try and see how far you can take it. I hope your W would be patient with you.
CL
CL 53 W 54 M 20 yrs. 03'-09' Separation + Old Patterns + GAL 10-14' Piecing
"The Master allows things to happen. She shapes events as they come."
Not really the type of "dancing" I was referring to, but it's a positive interaction. I personally think the "dancing" your W is attracted to isn't the actual act of dancing, but the interaction between the two.
The male leads and is confident and sure of his moves. Throughout all your posts, it almost seems like that's what your W wants in you.
M-43 W-40 2D - 9 and 5
Emotion, yet peace. Ignorance, yet knowledge. Passion, yet serenity. Chaos, yet harmony. Death, yet a new life.
Had a good day at school today...but my first test is friday.Yekes.......
Little journaling.....
My dog has had a problem with an ear infection. I took her in about a month ago and the vet gave me medicine to put in her ear. W has been helping me but the infection has not gotten any better. When I got home from school today, W told me that she called the vet and made an appointment for "Nellie" at 3:40. I told her I had to go over my uncles at that time and she said.... Now get this….
“That’s fine I’ll take her” now my wife has never taken my dog to the vet. It’s not an easy thing to do...
Doc
And if I claim to be a wise man, well It surely means that I don't know
