She called asked if we should get din before show. Picked up Girlfren'. Went to italian place. Table for five in the noisy with kids section please.
Walked around a bit.
Show was good. We talked a little before the start out of earshot of youngers. School choice will be an issue next year for oldest D. BFF thing sounds like it will soon be over.
Felt kinda neutral during the whole thing. Pleasant but not lampshade-wearing off-the-wall.
O'dog would write more but tired.
"My actions are my only true belongings. I cannot escape the consequences of my actions. My actions are the ground upon which I stand." Thich Nhat Hanh
I need to be watchful that she isn't trying to keep tabs on me or somehow call the shots in Act II. Just a slight O'dog suspicion but one I need to keep in mind.
"My actions are my only true belongings. I cannot escape the consequences of my actions. My actions are the ground upon which I stand." Thich Nhat Hanh
O'dog is going to start posting in "Surviving the Big D". More appropriate to my sitch.
"My actions are my only true belongings. I cannot escape the consequences of my actions. My actions are the ground upon which I stand." Thich Nhat Hanh
It took me about 1/2 way through all your posts to realize you were the one being treated and not her...
I do see signs of depression and I see that you suffer the same fate as me - It comes and goes...
I also see you do the same thing I do and forget your meds - Not a good thing however I am not here to reprimand you...
You are a grown man and you know in order to keep yourself stable, you have to pop that pill everyday...
I abhor taking the meds but I know what happens if I don't take them.
Walking/running/getting fresh air will help tremendously as well...
Not stressing on what she may be doing/seeing/thinking etc...Will also help you...
My Dr. tells me the mind can only take so much before it will shut down on its own - A defense mechanism if you will...
In order to prevent that from happening, you have to step in and take over...
It isn't easy, I have been dealing with this for 21 years and some days are better then others...
Bi-polar isn't fun to live with, depression isn't fun to live with, however we can live life to the fullest as long as we don't let our lives be defined by that.
For the longest time I allowed it to define me and now I don't...
It may be a part of me however it isn't all me...
I am not sure how long you have been treated or if this is something new for you however you can make it through...
Don't let it rule your life, don't let it define who you are, don't allow it to take over...
Take your meds and if they aren't working the way you feel they should, see your Dr. - It took me 8 different kinds of meds before we found a "cocktail" that worked for me...
Get some fresh air every day, get good sleep - at least 8 hours if possible, avoid alcohol/drugs...
Talk/journal - Don't keep it all in... I post here as well as a blog I have/I counsel with my Pastor as well as my shrink...
I try to walk every night after work and I know when I am getting pushed to that point so if I feel it coming, I remove myself from the situation...
You know your body/your mind and you know when you have had enough...
When you are at that point, turn around and walk...
Don't allow anyone to push you past the point of no return...
I don't want to have to visit you in a nuthouse
Please let me know if you have any questions at all and I apologize this is so long.
(((Hugs)))
May All Who Seek To Take My Life Be Put To Shame And Confusion; May All Who Desire My Ruin Be Turned Back In Disgrace. ~Psalm 40:14~
I've always underestimated how much self care is involved - sleep, vitamins, exercise, no alcohol. It doesn't seem to take much to upset that unsteady equilibrium.
"My Dr. tells me the mind can only take so much before it will shut down on its own - A defense mechanism if you will..." This makes a lot of sense. I've been to the point where things get so compounded and worried that I really can't function anymore and my mood crashes. I never thought of what's happening in this light but now it will be enormously helpful to know what's going on.
Distancing myself from She helps. Sometimes it seems O'dog doesn't care but that's not the case. O'dog is just taking care of himself.
I'm going to keep working with dr. This depression just comes and goes and I'm just not 100%.
"My actions are my only true belongings. I cannot escape the consequences of my actions. My actions are the ground upon which I stand." Thich Nhat Hanh
You hit the nail on the head with one sentence - "It doesn't seem to take much to upset that unsteady equilibrium."
Good you recognize that...
Sometimes it takes people many years to see it and then accept it...
"I've been to the point where things get so compounded and worried that I really can't function anymore and my mood crashes. I never thought of what's happening in this light but now it will be enormously helpful to know what's going on."
This I could have written myself...
I had to face the one thing I had been running from my whole life and no-one could force me to face it... NO amount of pointing it out to me would have helped... Just like our WAS, it is something they have to come to on their own but do know this - No matter what, you will be just fine...
Keep seeing your Dr. Keep taking your meds. Find something to help you refocus when you feel the pressure building up. Let O'dog define the depression - Don't let the depression define O'dog.
You know where I am if you want to talk
May All Who Seek To Take My Life Be Put To Shame And Confusion; May All Who Desire My Ruin Be Turned Back In Disgrace. ~Psalm 40:14~
Run yesterday (took lots of effort) followed by a motorcycle ride helped chase The Black Dog away for awhile. Zen this morning. Partially cloudy with a chance of dog bite.
Haven't heard from WomanFriend in a while.
"My actions are my only true belongings. I cannot escape the consequences of my actions. My actions are the ground upon which I stand." Thich Nhat Hanh
Saw Friend at kid drop-off this morning. Talked for a while.
There's been this kinda open invite to join his biz. He likes and needs my dog tricks and I like his style. We are going to talk more about getting in because there's nowhere left to move in current organization. They are nice people otherwise wouldn't have stayed for so long but O'dog is a tired dog and getting burned out.
O'dog credit rating is about zippo after the ch13 so I don't know where the $ would come from to buy in or how that would work. There's always retirement money but that's very risky...hmmm...Will find a good accountant before I do anything.
"My actions are my only true belongings. I cannot escape the consequences of my actions. My actions are the ground upon which I stand." Thich Nhat Hanh
No, O'dog! Not the moms at the elementary school. Waaaay to complicated.
"My actions are my only true belongings. I cannot escape the consequences of my actions. My actions are the ground upon which I stand." Thich Nhat Hanh
