I feel like pushing mine down a deep well right now. He can look up screaming for help and I will look down and say " I can't hear you
ohhh....good job of getting that anger out there! I think that is a stage that you need to go through....seriously (and I'm trying not to laugh at your quote, but can't help myself)
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
After having an awesome visit with my D in Atlanta, going to Hilton Head and Nashville, I will be flying home tomorrow evening. (sigh)
I had NC w/H while I was here. He texted me twice on my way out of town,I answered the first one, but not the second.
I can't help having my regrets about going home. I missed my dogs however! lol Ah... Going back to the nightmare of living w/ my MLCer. He must have had a great time w/ ow while I was gone. No pressure of having to see me. A week after I get back, he is going away for ten days. Probably with the skank. I don't know. My emotions for him are filled w/ hate today. I have been keeping the faith for so long that he will turn around. Last year when I went to visit my D, he made sure to tell me that he didn't miss me while I was gone. I didn't know it at the time, but he had skank then. That's when he was lieing to me that there wasn't anyone else. I believed him. What a fool I was.
Anyway... On my way out to enjoy what time I have left w/ my D. Lunch, shopping, etc.
Last night here in Atlanta with my D. Sadness is really setting in. It was so good for me to be away from home for awhile. I need to gather all my strength to go back into the world of living with H who is a perfect MLC student.
I start wondering if he brought ow into our house, and around my dogs. The thought of it literally makes me sick.
I need to stop dwelling on it, before it puts a big damper on my last day. (sigh)
Just stopping in to wish you a wonderful last day! Be careful and I look forward to seeing you back on here (That sounds awful since none of us want to be here lol...(((Hugs)))
May All Who Seek To Take My Life Be Put To Shame And Confusion; May All Who Desire My Ruin Be Turned Back In Disgrace. ~Psalm 40:14~
MLJ, I read your reference to the "Skank" and it made me smile. That's what I call the ow in my sitch.
Hold your head up proud and remember to keep breathing. Don't let thoughts of what your H may have done while you were gone spoil the happy thoughts of your good times on vacation.
You cannot control what he does. These guys in MLC seem to mostly follow the same script in thought and action. Continue to live your life being the best that you can be. Nothing that you can do will fix what is wrong with him right now. This is something that is "all his" and if you can "let go" and allow him to own it, wallow in it and wear it, you will feel a lot better.
It is not fun to live with a MLCer, but you are doing a great job and all of us reading are thinking of you.
Most of us are about as happy as we make up our minds to be.
