FIB, I agree with what Ian wrote! In fact, I told Bill that if I were you, I'd get up at the crack of dawn, if I had to, and take my son to that game. That is YOUR time with him and she should not be allowed to take that away from you!
FIB, I am so angry I could scream. I have no idea what you could do legally. Please speak to your lawyer. Is there something in writing about you having him on your half days? If there is, that is what should happen.
I think you need to tell her, "I am the assistant coach and I am supposed to do onto the field with him, so I will be taking him."
And folks, don't get into a contest about which parent is the most likely to become violent or weird, I posted to FIB based on my professional experience but don't compete about who gets the worst with their kids or the most violent (men won't win on that b/c parenticide is by far a man's thing BUT wth are we discussing that for ON THIS THREAD??? talk about a negative hijack....back to FIB....)
Anyhow, FIB, take Ian's advice and the others like printing out these threads and also, again, please call the L to see what rights your w has in these situations...I'm thinking you are fine legally but don't know that damn state's rules and am tired of the negative surprises. As I stated earlier, calling you "Satan" in front of your kids MUST be disclosed to your L and the judge and any guardian ad litem....it's sooo out of whack and sooo...oh I know, CRAZY...
(btw, I'm applying for some part time work AS a guardian ad litem in LARGE part b/c of your experience. I'll not soon forget these types of things....and if they pay lousy, which they DO, I can blame you...
blessings and hugs and prayers your way FIB...
((( j )))
M: 57 H: 60 M: 35 yrs S30,D28,D19 H off to Alaska 2006 Recon 7/07- 8/08 *2016* X = "ALASKA 2.0" GROUND HOG DAY I File D 10/16 OW DIV 2/26/2018 X marries OW 5/2016
FIB -- I think you have gotten the best advice from everyone here, but just wanted to show support. I am so sorry your W is putting you through this. I cannot imagine what these people thing some times, but I have seen things as a paralegal that would make your toes curl. Hang in there Frank.....((((HUGS)))) Lola
Im still standin better than I ever did looking like a true survivor feeling like a little kid Im still standin after all this time and Im picking up the pieces of my life without you on my mind..
if you can somehow mitigate your actions by doing it above board, like reminding your wife, even by text (then you'll have a RECORD of contacting her) that this is YOUR time and was planned IN ADVANCE and is a father son thing, etc, you may at least protect yourself a tad more, AND then, she can only go soooo crazy (25 said, stupidly...) right? Um, well, crossing fingers on that one now... oh dang...like someone here said, she embarrasses me as a mother and a woman. Hate that she's on "my team"...sorry F-!
(( j ))
M: 57 H: 60 M: 35 yrs S30,D28,D19 H off to Alaska 2006 Recon 7/07- 8/08 *2016* X = "ALASKA 2.0" GROUND HOG DAY I File D 10/16 OW DIV 2/26/2018 X marries OW 5/2016
Tough one on Friday. I would take my boy to such a special event. I think she is doing it just to get you fired up. Dont fall into the trap if there is a confrontation with her and the other family bad apples are there to back her up. Ask your L's advice, but I think I would have a recording device along.
Ian is correct about these threads being used as a record or log of your unfortunate adventure.
I really wonder about your L's experience or where the guardian ad litem has been. As I remember, your STBXW was sending too much nit picking info to the GAL and was told to stop.
I think I got lucky because my cousin got me in touch with a very experienced lawyer who dealt with the kids best interest first, plus I had already convinced my W to leave the house. I did get a bit of Schadenfreude a couple months ago when my X acknowleged that I did have one of the best (according to her L). Leading up to the filing, she was the one threatening to find a sugar daddy so she could buy the best L. It was partly that threat and exposing the kids to her A that made me beat her to the punch in finding a good lawyer.
Your W is committing one of the worst things a divorcing/divorced parent can do - parental alienation. I am hoping the court can she through her act or her real personality shows itself to those that can judge in the kids best interest.
My brothers X blew it big time in the counselor evaluation for custody. She actually told the counselor that if she did not make a favorable report that she would kick the counselors a$$. The next thing that occured was that my brother and his X were in front of the judge and the counselor was there with an armed guard. The judge immediately gave my brother full custody.
FIB, I may come across a bit differently. In my experience it's about a body of work not the chapters.
What Ian said about the guardian ad lidem was HEAVILY pursued by me only to be completely negated by her looks, guile and flirtations with said GAL. (Large lonely man)
What I'm saying is, obvious doesn't always work. DON'T BE BULLIED!! If cops are called its because the final boundary has been crossed.
Frank, there is a time to take gloves off. My kids realize some things I'll never talk about with them, they just know. It is between me and their mother.
A father is as much protecting as defending. Your backs against the wall.... What are you gonna do?
cire
Me 48 X's vary S 27 S 18 Back with high school sweety after 30 years..
I am sitting here reading your thread and I have tears in my eyes because it is just so sad.
When I see how much effort you are putting into your children and trying to co-parent with your STBX it makes me feel sick to my stomach.
My own Father walked out on my Mother when I was 6, and when my Mother pulled these types of stunts with him he chose to walk away and not fight her. He felt this was so much easier and even though I am now an adult, I wish my Dad had fought for me.
When my Husband walked out on my family, he didn't even look back for 2 1/2 years. He had no desire whatsoever to be a part of their lives, regardless of what he thought about me. He missed out on so much and will never be able to make up for the years he lost.
I wish more Fathers were like you, I truly do.
FIB, I wish I had an answer for you and I wish I knew the Law a bit better.
All I can offer you are cyber hugs and prayers.
I only live 4 hours away from you, and there are a few others here that live even closer. I have no problem getting in my car and being there if you need me, and I am sure many others feel the same way.
((((((((((hugs)))))))))))
There can be no testimony without a test. I am praying to go through this test and come out the other end with a new and better marriage then before.
I would do whatever it takes to be on that field with your son. You have planned this, paid for his ticket, you are the assistant coach and most importantly his father.
Ian is exactly right. She wants you to quit, she wants you to break. DO NOT let that happen. I wouldn't say another word about this to her. "Just do it" comes to mind. If that means getting up at the crack of dawn, so be it.
This is about you and your son making wonderful memories and she can't stand it. As for all that "strong arm" crap, I know I don't have to remind you of this but I will anyway.....
Thanks all. I have to go to my L's office today to sign papers. Will ask the AA to call my L. STBXW is literally is becoming more horrible by the day. FIB
Last edited by faithisbelieving; 05/27/0901:23 PM.
Me 55; XW 47; 2 kids (S13, D11) Bomb 05/19/06 Original thread http://tinyurl.com/yg2ou2t Last anniversary 04/25/10, Divorced 5/12/10 Status: Loving father of 2 beautiful children;
