I'll suggest four, from least to most stimulating from my MALE perspective, although all four are -much- better than "standard" missionary position (blech...). The names are my own: simple, not artistic.
(1) Woman on Top
The 'standard' mode of this is pictured here, but the key to best stimulation, for both partners, is for the woman to LEAN BACK (and put her arms back to support herself). The man can use a thumb or other fingers on the woman's clitoris to increase her stimulation further.
(2) Legs-High Missionary
This is perhaps our (my wife and I) favorite position right now, and is pictured fairly well here (although the sculpture is of an anal postion, so modify to the appropriate channel ). The key here is for the man to NOT support himself by his arms, but to keep his center of gravity in his hips. My wife generally keeps her arms on the bed or on my thighs, while I support her legs in one of a variety of ways: putting my hands under her knees, holding her feet or calves, planting her feet on my chest, etc. Holding her feet or planting them on my chest lets her build the best leg-tension for an O, along with my thumb on her clitoris. Once you try this form, you'll -never- go back to the woman-lies-flat form of missionary.
(3) Legs-Apart Rear Entry
Sometimes called "doggy style" and pictured poorly here. Again, the sculpture isn't quite right. For best male stimulation (and G-spot for the woman), the man should be on his knees (with legs together), and again keep is center of gravity low and in his hips -- he should not put his weight on his arms, and should leave them free to roam over his woman's body as he pleases or to grasp her hips to thrust harder. Also unlike the picture, my wife lays her head and shoulders on the bed (taking her weight off of her arms), and leaving one of her arms free to reach between her legs with a finger or vibrator. Done right, this position should rub -his- frenulum directly on -her- (aroused) G-spot quite vigorously.
(4) Legs-Together Rear Entry
Beginning with a Leg-Apart Rear Entry position, the man first puts one leg, and then the other, -outside- of his woman's legs, and moves hers -together-. The vaginal "squeeze" produced, coupled with the direct frenulum stimulation I mentioned above, challenges my ejaculatory control severely. This can be moved down to a woman lying down rear-entry position, which stimulates her quite deliciously, but movement can be a bit limiting if she has some "padding" or his "reach" is limited. A legs-together rear entry also works great as a standing position for the man, with the woman bent over a couch, bed, or chair.
In general, Lucky, I've found that the positions that stimulate me the most are those that (1) allow me drive in deeply -- to the 'hilt', (2) have the angle to rub her G-spot (near the pubic bone, as felt through the vaginal wall) directly on the penis glans, particularly the frenulum, and (3) take my weight -off- of my arms. I don't get this last one, but in general, positions that put me on hands and knees don't work as well -- I like having hands free to roam where they will, and the W doesn't complain either.
-- B.
Me 50, W 45, M for 26 yrs S25, D23, S13, S10 20+ year SSM; recovery began Oct 2007
THANK YOU. There is some very valuable information here. We have done all of those positions at one time or another, typically guided by H, but lately he's been holding back. I'll have to coax him... The legs-together recommendation is one that we haven't done much of, so I am eager to try that... soon, I hope!
I can't stop giggling about you saying "blech" to the standard missionary position. First, that tells me that you are FAR into recovery... I'd still be happy with a dry hump at this point. Second, you just saying "blech" about the sex I just had last night, that I'm so joyful about, is just hilarious. I mean, really!!! I can't stop giggling. You are one of my greatest treasures.
From a certain angle, this whole struggle is such a ridiculous comedy, isn't it?
I've sometimes taken a step back and compared sex to eating (another very important part of life in my family.) Imagine that we're all sharing ideas about the complexities of how to enjoy and succeed at Christmas dinner... another tangled mess of physical/psychological/emotional intricacies! How much you participate in the preparations, just what to say when you show up, navigating struggles over the drumstick, "yummy talk," holding your cutlery just right, keeping Christmas alive all year so that it feels authentic...
OK, I'll shake off the crazy now.
Thanks again, Baggy, for your thoughtful and helpful post. I find that practical information and actionable advice like this has been most helpful to me on this journey.
....and (3) take my weight -off- of my arms. I don't get this last one, but in general, positions that put me on hands and knees don't work as well...
Actually, I -do- get it. The 'hands-free' positions allow the man to build the best thigh- and hip-tension and enhance his arousal build-up. Putting weight on hands and arms (and adding tension there) removes it from legs and hips (and lessons the tension there).
-- B.
Me 50, W 45, M for 26 yrs S25, D23, S13, S10 20+ year SSM; recovery began Oct 2007
I think my H prefers the hands free positions, too, based on how he's guided me in the past. Hmmm... You'd think we would have discussed, but we still have work to do on talking about things. We tend to "let it be" in silent embrace, which is good in the name of enjoying the moment, but, we never get around to talking about details that would ultimately help us improve our orchestra.
Second, you just saying "blech" about the sex I just had last night, that I'm so joyful about, is just hilarious. I mean, really!!! I can't stop giggling. You are one of my greatest treasures.
ACK! NO, No, no -- I didn't mean it -that- way!!
I was thinking purely from the level of MALE STIMULATION provided. Any time my wife and I end up a standard missionary type of position (either man or woman on top), both of us with legs straight or close to it, we try it out for a little bit, and then I'll ask her:
Me: "Is that working for you?" Her: "Nope...is that working for you?" Me: "Nope..."
And then I'll change us to something different.
However, the position IS one of the best for kissing while copulating. I've give it marks for that, and that's often how we wind up there, just for a short bit.
-- B.
Me 50, W 45, M for 26 yrs S25, D23, S13, S10 20+ year SSM; recovery began Oct 2007
I had to laugh about the blech comment, too! I love missionary! It is usually the most intimate of all the positions...but then there are other man-on-top positions that are possibly not what others consider missionary...such as him standing by the edge of the bed, and you laying on your back scooted all the way to the edge of the bed (like its a ob/gyn table). That way he is on top but he is standing so he doesn't have to have all the weight on his arms. His knees and legs take a beating this way, though. But again...I just love the intimacy involved in him being above me or on top of me and looking into each others' face! Anyway...not sure if Baggy meant "blech" about his own dislike of that position due to being on his arms or if he meant it as in, its boring? All I can say is, NO position is EVER boring if you are doing it right! :0)
But I also loved those 3-D model pictures, Baggy! Thanks a lot for making me all turned on at work though...dammit!
But I also loved those 3-D model pictures, Baggy! Thanks a lot for making me all turned on at work though...dammit!
It occurred to me afterwards that the moderators might consider them inappropriate. I was intending to be instructional / educational, and thought they'd be a lot better than me trying to describe it (and no, I don't do stick figures either -- that's Spellfire's department).
Hopefully, no one is offended. DQ, go take a shower.
-- B.
Me 50, W 45, M for 26 yrs S25, D23, S13, S10 20+ year SSM; recovery began Oct 2007
But not only the 3-D models were on the front page...there is also a blonde naked girl with a catgirl mask on and a whip in her hand! Instructional? Yeah, it instructed me to now have visions of blonde boobs in my head all day, PLUS the 3-D models.
Again, thanks a lot, and there's no shower here at work, and even if there was, I wouldn't go in there to COOL DOWN.
Geh...with my poor vision, I generally have the screen partially magnified and with all colors inverted (for white on black text). I didn't even notice cat-girl.
Sorry, DQ.
I'm not laughing at you, really, I'm not....
Me 50, W 45, M for 26 yrs S25, D23, S13, S10 20+ year SSM; recovery began Oct 2007
). The key here is for the man to NOT support himself by his arms, but to keep his center of gravity in his hips. My wife generally keeps her arms on the bed or on my thighs, while I support her legs in one of a variety of ways: putting my hands under her knees, holding her feet or calves, planting her feet on my chest, etc. Holding her feet or planting them on my chest lets her build the best leg-tension for an O, along with my thumb on her clitoris. Once you try this form, you'll -never- go back to the woman-lies-flat form of missionary.