I've Come Full Circle 23

[kat727]

I really don't want to have this for several more weeks but if you keep sending jokes it might be worth it!

I have a funny true story. When I was in Flight Attendant training one of the instructors was telling us this story from her commuter Airline days: There was just the flight crew and one attendant on these short flights. We tried to come up with fun little giveaways during the flight. So I would ask if anyone had a button missing and the first one to raise their hand won. Sometimes it was who had a whole in their sock, who was wearing blue socks instead of black. You get the idea.

On Valentines Day, I tried to get in the spirit and asked if anyone had a heart on. No one raised their hand. I thought maybe they hadn't heard me. So I said " Come on, at least one of you has to have a heart on for Valentines Day." I saw these business men kinda of squirming in their seats but again no one raised their hand. I went in to the cockpit and asked the guys if there was a problem with the pa. They said they didn't think so but go ahead and ask again and they would raise the volume. I went out again and asked in a loud clear voice, " OK guys does anyone have a heart on?" Imagine my embarrassment as I heard the guys in the cockpit crack up and several men blushing raised their hands! Needless to say, I never phrased it quite like that again!!

kat

[whatdidido]

lol Two great jokes!! Feeling better, Kat?

[kat727]

Off and on. I just want to feel better without any help from meds. When I get up all I think about is how I can't wait to get back to bed. I have to push myself to keep some semblance of a routine/life. Thanks for checking. All fun stories and funny jokes appreciated!

kat

[hopeful4her]

For a true story, that was a really good one

I needed that.

Guy in a bar getting sh*t faced. He tries to get up from his chair and falls flat on his face. He drags himself to a table, pulls himself up, tries to take a step and again, falls flat on his face. Knowing that he HAS to get himself home, he decides to just drag himself home.

In the middle of the night, his wife comes out of the front door and find her husband asleep on the porch. She kicks him and says, "Hey, wake up you drunk ass. You left your wheelchair at the bar again, didn't you?"

[kat727]

keep the jokes coming. I just read the one on Yoyo's thread. Too funny!

One of my plates got broke last night. Turned out it was the last full size plate that ex and I had bought as our first set of day dishes. I still have a couple of bowls and saucers and cups left. Maybe this is helping me get rid of the past. That is what I am supposed to do this year. So I will be boxing up his stuff that he left and getting it out of the house one way or another. For fellow procrastinators, the only dead line on this is this year. :P

kat

[karen43]

Kat, breaking the plates sound like fun or selling at a garage sale maybe. Do people have Post-Divorce sales, buy my ex-loser's stuff for cheap??? I'd go!!! Hope you're feeling better today. They had an article in the paper today about it, several weeks it lasts and they call it The Crud. The writer says hers was cured by drinking Hot Toddys with whiskey (don't know if it would work without the whiskey since you don't drink), but she says she was told it either cures you or you don't care (after a couple). Karen

[karen43]

Kat, breaking the plates sound like fun or selling at a garage sale maybe. Do people have Post-Divorce sales, buy my ex-loser's stuff for cheap??? I'd go!!! Hope you're feeling better today. They had an article in the paper today about it, several weeks it lasts and they call it The Crud. The writer says hers was cured by drinking Hot Toddys with whiskey (don't know if it would work without the whiskey since you don't drink), but she says she was told it either cures you or you don't care (after a couple). Karen

[kat727]

I just think it is hilarious that ex always said, none of this is mine(his reason for not "cleaning"). granted four kids create a lot of paper clutter and clothes clutter and messes but come on, ALL of this stuff was our stuff...since the kids are ours.

Anyway while on the hunt for my misplaced Soc. Security card, it felt as if I was a detective. I had in my minds eye where it was but that wallet had gotten knocked behind this massively heavy thing ex's Dad made. Anyway, I finally get it and no, not there. I go through all my purse scenarios and am running from room to room and lo and behold it was in my carry all bag I used to use while I worked at AAA. Sorry, now you all think I am crazy but so glad that mystery was solved.

It also made me realize how crazy parts of my house are. I can't keep having things as status quo. Last night when ex brought the 3 youngest home, he keeps lingering. Why? Go home already. Turns out D8 said she wanted to stay. He was already half an hour late bringing them home and past their get ready for bed time. So now Ex thinks we should discuss them staying on Tuesday nights. Ok one saying she wants to stay does not mean that they all want to stay. I would think about it during the summer but not on school nights. He still wants everything his way and yet thinks I am controlling stuff.

I am not using my kids in this game he is setting up. He said to me, you just aren't doing this because you don't want to be nice. I said actually this is what you set up and you got that so let's try to stop the changing it stuff. So I guess he isn't happy with how he set it up but he fails to see that S13 doesn't want to go, he makes him and d10 is torn. His eyes are so clouded and he is still trying to grow that stubble into a beard!

Ok that was mean. He still tries to get me and on occasion succeeds.

kat

[kat727]

Get me a cold towel!! Ex had a conversation with S16 about going to move in with OW. He would probably have to get a new job and it would cut down on the time he actually spent with kids. He is probably hoping to cut down on what he owes me...is that possible?? Good thing I am sick already.

kat

[gForce]

I don't think where he lives, or whether he chooses to give up his time with his own children, would have an impact on alimony or child support. Maybe someone with some actual legal knowledge will pipe in. Your XH is such a loser.