I am a mandated reporter for child abuse. Now, I know that your x didn't hit your kids...did he ever hit you? Has he ever hit them?
You might want to tell him that if you do hear him hitting them that the Department of Child Services will have to be called in.
This woman should not be subjecting herself to this abuse. And it is a terrible example for your kids to witness. They should never think that this is normal and acceptable behavior, and I think any judge would go right to supervised visits if they caught wind of ex's behavior. You are right, in that this is another example of his dangerous need to control - through money, sex, contact with friends and between you and your kids, etc.
Talk to an IC; you can even find someone at the kids' school. They can help you with this. So can a local women's shelter (they might even have a L who agrees on low or no-cost representation).
I am glad that you came back to post. You were missed.
In the first few years our M was pretty violent. I became more insecure as his verbal abuse kept bringing down & therefore I became a doormat. Shortly after one physical violent incident, I started to see the light and got courage to take up for myself and the kids.
He learned? to 'control' his behavior for some time, but eventually his temper would get the best of him.
X needs lots of therapy. He is continuing w/ his control antics and will continue to destroy his R, but unfortunatley it seems this girls is willing to put up w/ it and her kid will suffer.
I am glad my girls dont have to live w/ this on a day to day basis, but no one can MAKE him get help.
I knew if X continued to be persistent in getting me to have sex w/ him, I would, so I did & not so much out of me wanting it, that sucks.....I dont know why I did.... more than one occasion.
The last time, I told him no that we were finished w/ this and to leave me alone. He has been really nice,kinda looking for reasons to come in the house. He lingers on long after he drops the kids or before he takes them. He fixes things now w/out my asking for his help AND he doesnt complain about it like he used to??
I just dont know..... I dont want to get back w/ him, I dont like that man anymore. I dont miss the sex either. I felt sorry for him. Whats wrong w/ me??
I do want to point out that I am loving my freedom and no longer feel the NEED for X.
I love the peace @ home and no longer walking on eggshells.
Should I just treat this as "having fun" like he says?? I will be then the OW. After were done I dont feel a thing , neither good or bad. I no longer see it as being "connected".
