Howdy all. Biting the bullet and starting a thread here in MLC. I've been around on various forums for a while and most recently have resided in Hopefulness. That's me, looking for scraps of what is good and hopeful, at least I keeping tying to be hopeful. I've been dealing with my WAS/MLC/EA/PA detached H who has been a poor roommate sleeping on the couch for 4 years. His major disconnect was 1 year before that. Yes, 5 years. I am tired and worn out and trying to force some type of change, whatever it may be.
That's not my reason for starting this thread on this day. Right now I am frazzled to the maximum, over the edge. One more thing just got added to the heap.
My H called within the hour, one of my dearest horses is having some problems. The first assessment was worse than it seems now an hour later, yet I hesitate to say he will be fine. He is 25 years young, he has mentored so many kids and adults and is recognized and well known by many people. He loves people, he loves to please and be special.
Mr Cutie horse is very special for many reasons, but he is also the horse I rode during our wedding ceremony. Mother Mare that my H rode....we lost her a month ago. Tomorrow is another wedding anniversary. To think of losing both of these wonderful animals so close together and so near to the anniversary they carried us to our beginning of together....This is too much, I am over the edge. I am a wreck waiting to happen. The timing of all this is happenstance? I don't understand this, I can't fathom why.
I could sure use some positive prayers or cyber vibes please. Mostly for Mr Cutie but me too. TIA
Live your life while you are still living. Riding the trail less traveled.
WCW, I didn't know that Mother Mare passed away! I'm soooo sorry to hear that! And now this horse too. How are you doing sweets? Holding up okay? Are you at home right now to see the horse? How's H doing with this?
I am so sorry to hear about your horse. Our animals are so precious to us and it is very difficult to see them like this, let alone hear about it.
Your spouse has been living under the same roof and on the couch for that long? Wow--that really is very stressful. I think I would have gone insane had my h stayed here and on the couch. I hated when he left but it was a good thing and the kids and I were able to relax, not having to walk on eggshells all the time.
You must have a lot of patience to be able to endure that.
The Bomb: 08/05 H moves out: 06/2006 H moves back: 01/07 & Out again: 01/07 H moves back: 03/08 & Out again: 04/08 H moves back: 05/09 & Out again: 07/09 Divorced 08-12 Kids: 22, 20, 19
My prayers are with you and your horse. I was saddened about the loss of your mare and this is just compounds everything. When I lost my gelding that I had for 20 years, I was lost, and at the point everything else in my life was going smoothly. I will keep you all in my prayers.
WCW, Ill say a prayer for you and All of your family...2 legs and four legs.
Gman Me 40 W 30 kids B 11 B 10 D 8 Been here off and on since 06. PA Confirmed Dec 08.. With God, anything is possible. Do or do not there is no try. Sometimes you have to roll the hard six...
MG, MT, Gman, FG, thanks for your kind thoughts. FG, within minutes of my post I got another call from H with more bad news. You remember Mr Cutie and Big Black, you and your daughter met them. (BTW, when do I get that pic of her at the gate between them?)
Big Black horse hopped to the gate on 3 legs. H called in frustration that he had already dealt with Mr Cutie, helped a new born calf, and now a major injury and H had to get on the road to meet his appointments. He asked if I would leave work and handle the vet appointment. I gladly did. Mr Cutie is on stall rest for a while, Big Black is on injured reserve and may not return to use again. I hope this is a case of preparing for the worst while hoping for the best. Just unreal. When I called H with the news he said 'oh crap'. For my H, that's a pretty big reaction. Big Black is the first horse that we purchased as a couple and he came off a ranch that H worked on. I call him my souvineer. He will need TLC for months and months, his internal stitches will last 170 days.
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Your spouse has been living under the same roof and on the couch for that long? Wow--that really is very stressful. I think I would have gone insane had my h stayed here and on the couch. I hated when he left but it was a good thing and the kids and I were able to relax, not having to walk on eggshells all the time.
Answers in order of your statements - Yes he has. Yes it is. I think I have. I don't even have eggshells left, just calcium powder. (you might have to be a chicken farmer to understand that)
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You must have a lot of patience to be able to endure that.
It took me a long time to figure out a plan to get myself to focus on me and what I wanted to do about anything. Once I figured it out and got strength enough to start moving forward there has been numerous positive changes from H. The point where I am now is realizing what people have told me for about the last 2 years - will H EVER be the man again I need him to be for me? will he ever be able to step up and be honest and truthful and a life partner? I still don't know, I think he is trying in his own subtle passive/aggressive way without admitting he has done any wrong doing. I don't know if that will ever be enough, I don't think I can push this all under the rug and let it all go without ever dealing with it. That would be H's way.
Well, what's good? um, diggin deep, let's see, the apple trees have a bountiful crop of good juicy apples. They're even better dipped in caramel!
Live your life while you are still living. Riding the trail less traveled.
I am so sorry to hear more bad news. I'll say a prayer for you.
The Bomb: 08/05 H moves out: 06/2006 H moves back: 01/07 & Out again: 01/07 H moves back: 03/08 & Out again: 04/08 H moves back: 05/09 & Out again: 07/09 Divorced 08-12 Kids: 22, 20, 19
what the he11 are you doing over here?!!!! This place is a dump - lol! I just fixed up a new spot for you all nice and pretty in hopefulness. Haysus- WCW. how the heck are we supposed to keep up with you? You have a thread, you don't have a thread, you post here, you post there..... My head is spinning.
Sorry about your horses. You should make cider with the apples.
lodo
PS, let me just add that over here your thread sinks out of sight like an elephant in a tar pit. Back in hopefulness, you floated awhile, gave a guy a chance to see you. I'm just sayin'...
WCW, Both the horses we met are the ones giving you grief now? I can't even tell D about it b/c it would break her heart. She still talks about the horses. About the pictures....I know, I know. I've put them on the back burner for long enough. Time to get out the camera box and see how to upload them somewhere and get them to you. Maybe I can try that this weekend. But I can't promise that either. The next 2 weeks are crazy busy!
I just fixed up a new spot for you all nice and pretty in hopefulness. Haysus- WCW. how the heck are we supposed to keep up with you? You have a thread, you don't have a thread, you post here, you post there..... My head is spinning.